


Harlequin Rising

by cooki3grabberdemon1992



Series: The Harlequin [1]
Category: Batman (Movies - Nolan), Batman - All Media Types, Suicide Squad (2016)
Genre: F/M, Past Abuse, Past Child Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-03
Updated: 2020-04-22
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:31:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 14
Words: 38,869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23463943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cooki3grabberdemon1992/pseuds/cooki3grabberdemon1992
Summary: Harleen was boring... a statistic. Harley, however, was like the batman. The batman was the other half of his coin the other side of his brain, she was the other half of his soul. For her he would do anything. Even something as boring as dealing with Harleen's demons. Beware the rise of the Harlequin.
Relationships: Joker (DCU)/Harleen Quinzel
Series: The Harlequin [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1687936
Comments: 21
Kudos: 32





	1. Prologue?

**Author's Note:**

> Rape elements will try to be as respectful as possible without too much detail. But it is there so please take care of yourself when reading. Joker and Harleen's relationship is unhealthy until she becomes Harley Quin. Story line is a bit of a blend between Nolan and suicide squad. The look of joker is Nolan but the relationship is more suicide squad style. This is my first attempt at this pairing so please be gentle about calling out characterizations that are not perfect.

This isn't really a prologue in the traditional sense. More like I wrote a short character study that warped into the idea for a series. So take it worth a grain of salt for the rest of the story itself. 

When he was feeling sweet, he was daddy. Someone to hold her gently and protect her from the real evil in the world, her voices, especially Harleen's which no matter how many years had passed would not be silenced. When he was angry at her, he was Mister J and she was Harleen again. Thankfully these times were rare and usually out of respect for the fact that Harley was still in there somewhere he simply told her to get lost until he cooled down. But most of the time he was puddin' especially in the bedroom. Where they would allow no chance that the ghost of Harleen's father could follow them there. A gentle reminder to Harley and the voice of Harleen in her head that not all men hit, and not all daddies rape.


	2. Chapter 1: Black gate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 1 month after the ferry incident

Everything in Black gate was gray. The walls, the furniture, the tray his food was served on, when he in fact did get food. Even the uncomfortable jumpsuit he wore was gray, with a gray wife-beater and gray briefs. The small cell in solitary did not have windows and the full panel of Plexiglass ensured that he had zero privacy from the guards. The cell was outfitted with a toilet and sink but without soap to wash up the sink was mostly pointless. And a small thin mattress on the floor as a bed frame could be used as a weapon. 

The Joker simply put was bored. While being in prison was a necessary part of the waiting game he was currently playing, he had forgotten how boring longer-term incarceration could be. Especially in solitary, where the guards were less inclined to play with him and there were no fellow inmates to drive mad... Mad, now there was a concept. Being transferred to the asylum would only slightly delay his plans and would prove to be far more entertaining. Maybe even prevent him from actually going insane with boredom. 

The Joker stood up and ran full tilt at the Plexiglass. He felt a burst of pain centered on his nose as he hit the glass. The nose was definately broken and the blood from it ran down the glass as the Joker held still for a moment. The hit had been enough to make his head slightly fuzzy, much like when the batman had slammed his head down in the police station, which was exactly what he wanted. No reason for this to hurt worse then it needed too and would dull the pain for the next couple of runs at the glass until he passed out. 

\------------

When the Joker woke up he was strapped down to a gurney in the prison's infirmary. He could hear whispering from the staff but couldn't make out the words. It would take a few moments to orientate himself between the blinding light and the migraine caused by the blows to his head. He slowly started taking stock of his injuries starting with the broken nose from the first run. He could feel the blood still caked on his face but the nose itself had at least been set to rights as much as possible. He could also feel congealed blood where his hair met his face. Apparently none of the nurses had bothered to clean him up. The most concerning however was the IV in his arm filled no doubt with pain killers. He slowly continued to blink to remove the fuzziness and get accustomed to the light. 

"I'm telling you, he's faking it and agreeing to have him evaluated is just giving him what he wants. As much as I hate being near the freak much better here then in the looney bin where he gets the comfy life while talking about his "feelings". "

"I don't know Jim, I don't think he should have been brought here in the first place. Look at all the stuff he's done. No sane person would do something like that. He should have been evaluated first thing and sent off. Even if its more comfortable the doctors there are allowed to keep him sedated pretty much for the rest of his life. That sounds much better to me."

"Why so serious? It's not, uh, because of me is it?" Eyes rolling around as he raises his head as much as possible to look at the nurse and guard currently discussing his stay. His voice which had started as a growl at the first sentence had turned into a mock gentleness as if he was actually concerned that he was causing them discomfort. 

The nurse let out a squeal of shock and ran to go call the warden to let him know that the Joker was conscious. The guard however, stood glaring at the joker and tightened his grip on his baton. At the ready to pull it out and pummel the Joker if he tried to escape. Joker rolled his eyes and lifted his hands as much as possible.

"Um.. what exactly do you think I'm going to do? In case you haven't noticed I'm a little tied up." He licked his lips along the bottom and pushed his tongue into his scars causing them to be more prominently displayed. He didn't like going without his make up. He enjoyed seeing the discomfort in others faces at the black khol eyes and the slash of red as if the scars up his face were still bleeding. Made even more noticeable by the shock of white paint that coated the rest of his face. 

Before the guard could respond a new voice arrived on the scene. The warden with an additional two guards as back up. "Inmate..0666. Due to your recent episode we have no choice but to allow a psychologist to come and exam you to see if you are fit mentally to remain at black gate prison. Until then you will remain in the infirmary under suicide watch. Strapped in at all times to make sure you don't get loose. "

"And, uh, what if I have to..." He glanced down at his dick poorly covered by a hospital gown and looked back up at the warden with an exaggerated version of his normal tick, slowly swiped his tongue across his lip. Somehow making the gesture even more obscene then if he had verbally referenced to taking a piss. 

"Oh don't worry inmate they have some very unpleasant equipment to help with that. " The warden's face developed a wide smirk before continuing " If you are found to be mentally stable enough for black gate you will be moved back to solitary where we will never have a repeat of this incident again. And if not well then you're Arkham's problem." 

"See that's what I like about you warden. You are not as serious as these guards. Know how to crack a smile at someone's pain. I may even let you live. Though I wouldn't hold out hope for that little girl of yours. What's her name again... Natalie?" 

"Hook him up and make sure his restraints stay tight. And take him off those pain killers. Preferable before you put in the catheter." With a glare the warden stomped off and the nurse set about switching out the IV bag to one that didn't have the pain medications. At least that took care of that problem. If he was going to play mind games to ensure he was moved to the asylum he wanted to make sure he had his focus. The guards looked on stone faced as the joker was prepped for his stay in the infirmary only twitching when he started laughing at the pain from the catheter. 

\----------

It took two weeks for the appointment to be set up. Since the headache of housing the Joker was something both institutions wanted to avoid it was decided that a doctor from a hospital out of state would be doing the evaluation. This meant allowing him time to study the joker's police interviews as well as police reports about the terrorist attacks that the joker had organized against Gothom. 

The joker had remained in the infirmary as the warden had said under suicide watch. While being strapped to a bed was uncomfortable he enjoyed being able to mess with the guards and nurses as well as the inmates that were constantly showing up. Apparently he had started a trend, that or the inmates were purposely putting their rivals in the infirmary so they would be terrorized by the joker. The best part was the sponge baths, not for the usual reasons. The joker considered himself an idea and rarely felt the need to engage in those kinds of activities but more because of everyone else's reactions to the event. The first nurse ordered to give him the bath quit on the spot. The second was the same one that had put the catheter in and she shook the entire time at one point even whimpering when he flexed his arm muscles when she was wiping down his arms. He didn't see her again. The last nurse was a little too thorough and went over a certain spot several times pouting when there was no reaction. Joker added her to the kill list on principle glaring at her the next time she decided he needed a wittle bathy, her words, before his meeting with the doctor.

When the time came for the evaluation the Joker was escorted down by 6 guards. Two on each side of him. One directly in front and one behind. They hadn't allowed him to change back into the standard jump suit and he was marched down the hall in the hospital gown. He made a game of swinging his hips and butt as much as possible in the shackles while humming hail to the chief. The strings of the open back hospital gown gentle hitting against his skin on each sway. 

Like everything else in the prison the meeting room was filled with nothing but gray. The room was cramped barely big enough to accommodate the big table that would be kept between him and the doctor doing the interview. The guard that had been forced to guard Jokers rear slammed him unto the seat as the other guards made quick work of attaching the shackles to the chair and table and making sure both were properly bolted down with no chance that the Joker would be able to turn them into weapons. 

At the doctor's prompting the guards left the room and taking position outside the door in their riot gear. 

"So inmate 0666. I'd like to start this off with introductions. My name is Dr. Ezra Fitzpatrick. What's your name?" The doctor was an older gentleman. He had laugh lines and a twinkle to his eye that spoke of few problems and easy living. Though his smile had a slight crease to it. A wanness usually seen by those forced to be polite to someone they hated. His hair was slowly turning white and the joker wondered how much of that white could be contributed to him being assigned to the Joker. 

"Joker"

"Hmm, I would like us to talk as much like equals as possible. And I don't believe calling you by an alias and supporting your delusions will allow us to do that. I also don't wish to refer to you as inmate but will for the reminder of this session if needed. The choice is yours. A friendly conversation where we decide if your obvious mental illness can be treated here at this prison safely or if you need to be under the kind of specialized medical program only the asylum can offer you." Dr. Fitzpatrick leaned forward waiting to see how the joker responds to logic. 

The Joker giggled and it turned into full blown mad chuckles with the Joker rocking back and forth. "oh, you are good doc, may I call you doc? You make a very reasonable point. My name is Jiminy... Cricket. And I'm the conscious of Gothom." 

At the end of the session the guards walked him back to solitary. His return would only be temporary in a week, after the asylum had been given time to prepare, the Joker would be transferred.


	3. Careful what you wish for

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joker arrives at Arkham

The Joker was transferred to Arkham at night, two days earlier then when he was told the transfer was going to take place. Apparently they didn't trust him not to have an ambush set up by his men. The whole event was conducted like a scene from a bad spy movie complete with a sudden wake up call in his cell and a black bag thrown over his head with the guards man-handling him into a prison transfer van. If he remembered correctly it was a 30 minute drive from black gate to the asylum which gave him a little bit of time to start waking up in case there was an interview conducted upon his arrival. Doubtful though considering the way the hand off was currently being conducted. The Joker had a moment of worry that maybe getting himself transferred was the wrong move. While it would be much more entertaining then the prison there was the possibility that he would be drugged up during his stay. That would help edge off the boredom, but it wouldn't be the desired result, he didn't like dulling his senses especially when he could be using that time productively to plan. 

The Joker decided to use the ride to form further plans just in case this transfer didn't go his way. His best bet was to get whichever doctor was assigned to him on his side to make sure he was given placebo drugs. Taking him off medications entirely would be too obvious and the doctor would just get replaced. Depending on the doctor his best bet would be bribing or if he gets a goodie two shoes coercion usually by threatening a loved one. It would also require getting an orderly on side but that wouldn't be hard. There was always one willing to break the rules if you can ensure they are well paid. With tentative plans in place and nothing further he could do until more pieces on the board started to shift the Joker tilted his head back and closed his eyes the bag shifting a little and becoming even more uncomfortable as he did so. No point in trying to get back to sleep with this contraption on and shifted back into the previous position. 

The van pulled to a sudden stop and only the hand cuffs and chains kept him from falling out of his seat though the sudden jerking motion made him grind his teeth to keep from making a pained hissed. The guards in the back of the van weren't as lucky and he heard one of them fall to the floor of the van causing the Joker to laugh out loud at their misfortune. The guard retaliated by slamming his baton into the joker's stomach. The joker briefly leaned over on reflex before catching himself and straightening back up in his seat. He could hear his chains being un-hooked and reorganized for the walk into the asylum and pulled on his feet and marched forward. There was a brief pause for the guards to lower down the ramp for him since he couldn't do the hop down in his ankle shackles. He stepped out onto the ramp and could feel that it had started to down pour quickly causing him and the guards to be soaked from the cold rain in the quick walk into the building. Once inside he could feel his guard being changed and he was subject to a thorough pat down. He had thought that once they reached the building the hood would be removed but it stayed on during the entire transfer including for the walk to his new cell. At one point in time he thought he heard voices murmuring but couldn't make out the words. 

The entire process had taken about 30 minutes and the cold from the rain had really started to sink in causing small little tremors that he couldn't quite stop. At last they had arrived at this new cell and he was roughly made to sit on the bed the bag finally being removed. The lights were low in the cell due to the late hour and his eyes didn't need time to adjust to the light. He could see what was clearly the director of Arkham along with three orderlies. 

"I don't appreciate your scheming landing you here, Joker, this whole process has given me a fucking headache. I want to make it clear that whatever it is that you are planning, whatever it is that caused you to make sure you were transferred won't work. You will spend every day for the rest of your life having your mind turned to mush with sedatives. You will not be given therapy sessions, you will not have yard time or contact with the other inmates. You will spend your days here in this little cell on happy pills only interacting with orderlies I have hand picked. Welcome to Arkham inmate 0666. Hope you are "happy" with your transfer." With a nod from the director he was rushed by the three orderlies and a shot of a sedative was given to him. Due to the lack of sleep and the cold still seeping in from his wet clothes he wasn't able to fight off the sedative like he usually could. With little shakes his body drifted unconscious and the joker had dreams of the cold. 

\------------------  
Harleen Quinzel was... forgettable. If anyone had cared to go around and ask the people in her day to day life what she was like, the over all answer would be sweet, or that would be the answer after they finally remembered who Harleen Quinzel was. While no one could deny she was a beautiful girl she had a presence that somehow demanded that people overlook her while also managing to not loose any of the softness or sweetness of her overall demeanor. Her stunning blue eyes were one of her most noticeable features less for their beauty and more for the fact that the color seemed to dull and lose all life, in moments of great stress always accompanied by tremors in her fingers. It was as if they were transformed into glass and she into a perfect little doll. Once she had noticed that this feature drew attention to her she promptly purchased prescription less glasses to hid behind. 

Harleen had been a doctor at Arkham for two years exactly when it was announced that the Joker was being transferred to them. All unnecessary paperwork was to be delayed and sessions with patients stopped unless the patient was deemed high risk and even those were to be shortened as much as possible. The staff were getting ready with several things being thrown at them by the state to make sure they were in compliance to house a terrorist of Joker's status. No member of staff was excluded from helping and all were expected to take updated crash courses on emergency procedures. All staff members including doctors were working 15 hour shifts and Harleen didn't think that the new director had gone home in several days. He kept shifting between the same two outfits and she had heard some of the nurses giggling and gossiping about him having a fold out couch in his office that supposedly his male secretary was a frequent occupant of. 

All members of staff had to undergo a brand new background check and any found to have criminal records that were previously overlooked or had been incurred after employment were let go. What Harleen deemed ineffective morality assessments were also handed out and while those may be effective for the rest of the staff, Harleen didn't think those would be very effective for the doctors. Similar tests were often given to their patients and would be easy for a psychiatrist to answer with the desired answer instead of how they actually felt. All doctors gave a huge sigh of relief when it was confirmed that they would not be expected to give therapy sessions to the Joker. The assessment done at black gate being deemed enough to decide an appropriate drug plan with reassessment done every few months by the director of the asylum to see if the drug dose needed to be increased. No one even thought of the possibility of a decrease in the prescriptions that would be given to him. 

After almost a week of crazy long shifts Harleen was ready to drop. All staff members were given a bonus generously donated by Bruce Wayne who was paying for any needed updates to house the Joker. The bonus they were told was for their hard work and dedication but to Harleen it seemed like a consolation prize that didn't quite meet up to the additional work load that had been placed on their shoulders. As a salary employee she was not getting additional pay for the long hours being put in and even her normal sweetness was being pushed to its limits. 

And then finally it was all over. One day they came in to work and were called for a staff meeting. The director announced that during the night the Joker had successfully been transferred and was already in his cell and was reacting well so far to his medication regimen. He apologized for not telling the staff in advance but they did not want to risk someone accidentally letting slip to anyone that the Joker was being moved. He explained that he would be working closely with a dedicated group of orderlies and that anyone found trying to approach the Joker without authorization could be subject to termination. The staff would be expected to still maintain slightly longer hours but they were working on a schedule that would allow everyone some much needed time off to relax and refresh. 

It took a full two months for things to finally truly settle. The promised time off being delayed when the Joker developed pneumonia in the first week of his stay at Arkham. The staff hours increasing back up temporarily to make sure there were enough guards and orderlies around while the joker was in the infirmary. To the disappointment of most of the staff the Joker recovered and was swiftly put back on his medication regimen and shoved back in his hole of a cell. For Harleen time went on. She saw her normal patients and went home to her little apartment just to turn around the next day and do the same thing all over again. Harleen eventually got her extended weekend and used the bonus money she had received to take a trip back home. Carefully avoiding contact with her parents she spent the three day weekend with a few friends from highschool and to visit her brothers grave. 

Having a weekend, especially one that was three days, off call was exactly what she had needed and walking into Arkham on Tuesday she felt as if her shoulders were a hundred times lighter and she didn't care quite as much that the guards seemed to actually notice her a bit today. This feeling of lightness was almost immediately disrupted when she entered her office. The assistant director of Arkham was waiting for her and she took a big gulp of air worry causing her eyes to quickly dull and she put her hands in her pockets to hid the tremors. 

"Doctor Quinzel, welcome back. I'm sorry to say that while you were out one of your patients passed away. Ms. Anita Thomas. The death has been deemed a suicide, she managed to tongue her medications and she took the opportunity of you being away to make sure that she had time before anyone would go into the room to check on her. The orderlies assumed that she was sleeping and left her alone. Now I want to reassure you that you are not being held responsible in any way. I do see here that you had a note in her file stating your concern about the lack of effectiveness of the medications as well as a concern of suicide risk. I've spoken to all orderlies involved about the importance of checking every patient, every time to make sure that all medications are taken as directed by the doctor. I've rescheduled all of your morning appointments to give you some time if needed and ask that you put final notes in her file before taking it down to the archive for our deceased patients. Please be careful when you do so. Unfortunately that will take you right by the Jokers cell. Here is a hall pass if you will in case one of the orderlies down there stop you." With a grim nod of his head the director left the room and Harleen sat down and shed a few tears for her patient. Ms. Thomas had no family that she was on good terms with and she most likely would be buried without any fuss in the Asylum's graveyard. No one else is going to mourn her. It might as well be me. 

\----------  
It took almost no time to put final notes into Anita's file. Having been gone at the time of the suicide most of the notes had been completed by the doctor in residence and with her last session being the day she had left those notes had already been completed as well. The notes contained more or less a summary of the sessions, the break down of procedure that had allowed the suicide to be a success and her signature to verify that she was confirming that all contents of the file were correct to the best of her knowledge. 

When she was ready she took the elevator down to the basement and stepped out. She was almost immediately stopped by one of the director's hand picked orderlies to confirm that she had authorization to be there. She handed out her hall pass and was waved on walking passed the jokers cell she could not see him through the door and with the orderlies watching and her own fear she didn't linger long to try. Thankfully the archives were not too far down the hall and she was able to quickly dash into that room. The filing system was a bit of a wreck no one caring much to organize files of the deceased patience and Harleen was tempted to find a place to just stash the folder as putting it where it was actually supposed to go would take her a few hours as she would have to reorganize several improperly filed items to make room. As she was contemplating this she heard a crash, not thinking about what that might mean she immediately ran to the noise to see if someone needed her help. 

\-----------------  
The joker was beyond annoyed. Two months. Two fucking months and there had not been one slip up he could exploit, not one single person other then the director's most trusted coming in to contact with him. His mind had been in enough of a haze that he hadn't been able to properly think but not enough to keep him completely passed out meaning that much as he had been at black gate he was bored in addition to being pissed. He was thankful of the fact that his escape had already been planned previously while he was still at the prison though now he wished that he hadn't decided to give Gothom quite so much time to recover before he started another game. He wasn't sure he could stand another 7 months of this but he also didn't have a way to contact his men and let them know of an updated timeline to get him out. 

He started to recount the dots on his ceiling when he heard it. The gentle tap of a small heel, so balance of probability meant that it was a female. Most likely a doctor as the nurses and orderlies wore tennis shoes something to make it easier to run after or take down a patient if needed. Someone new was coming down the hallway. This was the opportunity he had been waiting for the Joker started looking around his cell to see what he could do to make a disturbance. He knew from previous tries that the orderlies always followed the same procedure. Two would enter the cell and the third would stay in the hallway to make sure no one was attempting to contact or break out the Joker. The door to the cell however was always left open in case the third needed to quickly jump in and assist if the joker was being particularly spirited and two people were needed to hold him down while the third gave another dose of sedative. Finally he came to the conclusion that his bed was going to be the best bet and started crashing it against the wall as much as possible. 

It only took a couple of tries and almost immediately the door was slammed open making an even bigger crashing noise and he heard those soft heels running in the directon of his cell. Perfect he thought. Two of the orderlies approached him one getting the sedative ready while the other started to attempt holding him down. Joker made sure to start struggling while still making sure he would have a view of the female doctor when she came by. 

"Ricky, get in here man he is really struggling." The third orderly rushed into the room to help hold the joker down. The joker still struggling and the orderlies lost their grip on him a couple of times. "You guys, get him pinned down I can't inject the sedative like this it won't be effective if it doesn't go in right." None of the orderlies paid attention to the doctor as she turned up in the door frame but the Joker did. He looked at her trying to determine what the most effective route would be for her. First he noticed her eyes. They were a dull blue color almost like glass they looked unreal. Something you would see on a doll not a person. Then he noticed the shaking of her hands, not necessarily from fear of the joker. He know that shake, the girl had PTSD of some kind, surprising that she was not on leave while getting help. Not recent then if her co-workers didn't know of the circumstances and the symptoms were under enough control that she wasn't forced on a medical leave. Not obvious scarring and the stance was not military. Despite being what most would consider attractive she was very modestly dressed going so far as having fake glasses to hid those eyes that most men would be ga ga over. Balance of probability was high that it was some form of sexual assault. He knew his play. 

"Get off me, I said no, I don't want to be sedated. No, stop, I said stop. I'm not consenting to this!" Putting enough panic in his voice to pull her heart strings while still keeping to his Joker persona he looked at her with pleading eyes. Bingo, he had her. Her eyes were now flashing between panicked dull and fierce ice. Finally the orderly was able to get the sedative in and the Joker didn't try to hold back as he normally would. He allowed his body to go very limp and lifeless as if he had given up fighting as if there was no strength left to continue fighting on. He peeked back up to her face and their eyes meet. He slowly started drifting off hearing her assertions that she would be talking to the director about this.


	4. Coffee shop introductions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harleen makes a life changing choice and makes an ally

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning references to child abuse, medical abuse, and child rape are in this chapter. Please take care of yourselves while reading. 
> 
> I wanted to write Harleen in a way that makes it clear while she is usually able to fool others she is not doing okay and has never truly dealt with the trauma she went through. While I have never taken physiology courses I did take several courses in school that dealt with family especially when there has been abuse in the home. The first thing these professors usually warned the class of is that at times the information could be graphic and to make it clear that was a place of learning not someone's personal therapy session. Its pretty common cannon that Harleen comes from a problematic household and got into her field to understand her family trauma however as my professors pointed out to my class that doesn't substitute getting actual help.

Harleen woke with a scream. She could hear her upstairs neighbor pounding on the ceiling and telling her to shut up and cut off into a choked sob. If she kept this up she would be receiving an eviction notice due to noise complaints. She looked up and focused on the projection from her alarm clock onto the ceiling. 4:30 in the morning, she groaned, she needed to be up in an hour and with the dream she just had going back to sleep would do her no favors. It wouldn't make her less exhausted and her neighbors would just be pissed when she woke them up again. 

She rolled out of bed and made her way out of her room to the bathroom. The lingering terror from the dream had her turning on all lights along the way. Once in the bathroom she stripped out of her nightgown throwing it to the floor. It was a little ratty from years of wear but she couldn't quite bring herself to throw it away. It was one of the first pieces of clothing she bought herself when she had moved away to college. All of her old pjs being thrown out. It was a vibrant blue color and went past her knees, the gown had almost no shape to it and at the top where it hinted at dipping to show cleavage was covered with a beautiful butterfly instead. 

Turning on the shower she moved over to the sink to look in the mirror while the water warmed up. She would try a little make up later but most likely she wouldn't be able to hide the result of a fourth consecutive day of little sleep. She was starting to look pale in addition to having the bags under her eyes which she gently poked at. The dream had been the same one for the last four days. Harleen and Joker would approach each other in a doorway to watch what was happening within the room. It would usually start off in 10 year old Harleen's room the princess decor a mockery of the horrors that took place there. Adult Harleen would watch with tears streaming down her face as the 10 year old version of herself was raped by her father. The joker would slip his hand into hers offering what small amount of comfort he could to his dream companion. 

"why is daddy's pretty little doll crying?" 

"Please stop daddy. It hurts." The creaking of the bed would only picked up at the sound of her small bell like voice and the scene would change. They would then be standing back in the doorway to Joker's cell watching him plead and demand that the doses of the sedation to stop. Looking up at Harleen and the dream counterpart of the Joker to help him and stop the attack. The dream joker would pull her into his arms at that point almost as if he needed comfort watching this other him be tortured. 

"In the end, Harleen, how different is this really." He would whisper in her ear as if to avoid the orderlies attention. "Both of us have had the rights to our bodies violated in the most unforgivable of ways. Please help me, Please make it stop." The scene would shift again and this time it would be her father administering the sedative but this time it would be to the Joker that had held her safe in his arms. His body going limp and lifeless, the dream telling her that this time it wasn't temporary that he wouldn't be getting up. That she had failed to protect him from her personal monster who had gone too far. It was at that point that she would wake up screaming. 

Harleen squeezed her eyes shut and reopened them surprised to see that the mirror was already completely fogged over. She quickly jumped into the shower to make sure she was still able to get some use out of the hot water before it was all gone. Showers had always been something of a double edge sword for Harleen. One one hand there was nothing she loved more then that freshly clean feeling as if all the nastiness of the world had been removed. The shower itself however always caused her some level of anxiety and it had been worse over the last couple of days due to the dreams she had been having. Frequently as a young child her father had decided she needed "help" or "supervision" while in the shower and she had spent years terrified during every shower and bath about whether he would be joining her. She didn't have quite the same issues with going to bed at night mainly because she had done everything she could to avoid any similarity to the bedrooms of her childhood. With a shower unfortunately they frequently looked the same. Lathering up with Lavender scented products she quickly showered and stepped out of the tub putting on her bathrobe with rubber ducks on it she ran a towel through her hair.

Going back into her room, she decided on what she was in the mood to wear that day. Pulling on a burgundy blouse and grey slacks and some boots with a chunky heel. She wasn't sure what to do about the Joker situation. Harleen was pretty sure one of the orderlies had typed off the director as he was refusing to meet with her. It was always phrased pleasantly enough to please contact her direct supervisor. That he couldn't answer because he was too busy etc. But as time went on it was clear she was getting stone walled on all sides. She wasn't sure what next step she could take but she knew she had to do something. She gently brought a foundation brush up to her face and attempted to somewhat hid her pale face and dark eyes giving it up as a lost cause she left on what was already applied and put on her glasses. She had lost a good portion of her extra time staring into space while contemplating her dream but checking her clock she decided she had time to swing by for coffee on her way to the tube station. Leaving her apartment she did her usual three turns of the doorknob to make certain that the door was locked and that she would remember locking it. 

The coffee shop around the corner was a little mom and pop shop that had somehow managed to stay open in both Gothom's failing economy and the take over of corporate chain coffee places. The shop being located in the University district had the owners affectionately blaming the college students for their success and lack of free time. Though more then once Harleen had seen the women give out free snacks to students desperately working on a thesis or paper of some kind using the caffeine as a desperate boost of energy to meet their due date. Harleen had been one of those students and she had been coming to this shop ever since. There was a slight queue and Harleen got in line behind a bubbly blonde who was giggling with a friend on her phone. The door swung open and Harleen turned around on habit to see who else was now in the shop. She blinked, that was Bruce Wayne. She blinked again, yup, definitely Bruce Wayne. Almost as if he felt eyes on him, he looked up and caught her eye. He tilted his head and whatever he saw had his eyes soften and a smile light up his face. The smile should have looked wrong on a man of his age. It wasn't the smile of a man with an attractive young women but rather the smile an affectionate grandparent would give their grandchild. It was soft, safe but with an edge of sad wisdom. He nodded his head at the cash register to let her know she was up without speaking up and accidentally embarrass her. 

After placing her order she stepped to the side to allow Bruce to order while her coffee was getting made. Looking back at him she suddenly had an epiphany, Bruce Wayne was on the board of directors at Arkham. His company had invested millions in the renovations to make the asylum up to the standards needed to house the Joker, both in money and equipment. This was her chance! 

"Mr. Wayne" She called quietly not wanting to draw attention given the delicate subject she was about to bring up. She waited for him to look at her before continuing. "My name is Dr. Harleen Quinzel. I work at Arkham and I heard that you had recently joined our board of directors. " He gave her another flash of that smile and nodded his head confirming what she had just said. " I'm very sorry, I know that this is probably completely out of line but I'm hoping that you can help me with a problem. I'm worried about the treatment a patient is receiving and I've tried to met with the director about it but I keep getting rebuffed. I'm still one of the newer doctors so I don't have much power to push the issue." As she spoke his eyebrow had first shot up but he brought it back down trying to bring his expression back under control. He didn't 100% succeed as there were still some rather severe frown lines on his forehead. 

He sent off a quick text, " Are you heading into work now?" She nodded, " would you allow my driver and me to take you? I'd like to hear more about this. The drive would give us a chance to talk. She nodded again and they grabbed their coffee's. Bruce being handed two cups and walked out to his town car. There was an older gentlemen standing by the car waiting to get the door. Bruce nodded at him and waited until he had opened and shut the door for Harleen before handing the man the second coffee. Both men swinging around to the other side of the car to get in. 

"Alfred, there's been a slight change in plans. We will be heading to Arkham and dropping Dr. Quinzel off. I may be going in for an emergency meeting with the director as well." 

"Very good, sir, do I need to contact Mr. Fox and reschedule?" 

"Already done Alfred" He winked at Harleen and she realized that was who he had sent the text too. "So, Doctor, tell me more. What about this patients treatment has you worried?"

"About four days ago, I had to run a file to our archives. While there I heard a crash and went to investigate and saw three orderlies sedating a patient. The patient was struggling but it was clear that he was lucid enough to deny consent of the sedative. He was begging them to stop, to not sedate him again. Sedation is a fine line in a place like Arkham. Some would argue that we are acting in loco parentis for those that are not deemed capable of looking out for themselves. However, that line was crossed when a patient who was in control of himself in that moment denied un-necessary drugs and was ignored." She paused and saw Mr. Wayne struggling to control the fury on his face. It was clear to everyone in the car that he was livid. 

"I'll make sure that this is dealt with. Do you happen to know the names of the orderlies responsible, and I will also need to know the patient name." Harleen hesitated, she knew that this next part was going to be the make or break of this conversation. 

"I need you to promise me you will keep an open mind." He did another of his head tilts with a confused look but then nodded. "The patient was the Joker." As furious as his face had been previously that is how blank it became when she mentioned which patient it had been. She also swayed slightly as the car gave a slight jerk the indication that Alfred had been listening and was shocked by the name she had just uttered. 

"Please, you promised to keep an open mind." He started to interrupt but she held up a hand to stop him. "Please, hear me out. I know what the Joker has done and I know that he is not a good person. That isn't what this is about. We as a medical facility crossed a line that should never be crossed. Much the same as medical doctors we took an oath to protect those patients and to not harm them. What we are doing to the Joker is a form of torture, it is cruel and unusual. Gothom does not allow the death penalty something I know from your recent interview about Arkham that you support. You said you didn't believe in an eye for an eye but that is exactly what we are doing to the Joker in ways that I have never seen duplicated with any other patient that has been in our care. Even other serial killers are given therapy to help with some kind of rehabilitation. Even if they would still have to spend the rest of their lives. We may not be killing the joker but we are forcing him to live out the rest of his life as a sedated vegetable which some would argue is worse. Let me ask you a question and I need you to answer it honestly. If I had said any other patient name, if you knew for example, that they had cut up their children and ate them, would you have stayed mad about the treatment you heard the joker was receiving?"

He let out a deep breath, "Yes, I would still be angry."

She nodded her head, "then what is being done to the Joker isn't justice, its vengeance." He looked startled and let out a pained chuckle. 

"You remind me of someone. I think the two of you would have gotten along very well." It was her turn to look startled and then she realized. 

"He killed her didn't he? The person that I remind you of?" He nodded his head. And she bowed hers in as close as she got to prayer, giving a silent moment to respect his dead. 

"I'll talk to the director. I'm only one member of the board but I will at least try. Most of the medication is going to be non-negotiable the people need to feel safe, but I will ask that a review be done and see if we can find alternatives that will keep him somewhat docile while not completely sedating him into a vegetable. I'm not sure what we could do in terms of therapy. If I remember correctly all the doctors were relieved to find out he wouldn't be receiving any." Here he gave her a look to point out that she wasn't completely innocent either in the treatment the Joker had been through. 

"I'll treat him, sometimes its easier to ignore the sentence you are passing on others in your relief not to be involved in their nightmare." She spoke with a bitterness that was echoed in his smile and she thought his eyes looked a little to knowing at her. That sad wisedom back in his eyes. 

"Thank you, I think it will help my case if I was able to present a doctor that is already willing to work with him." They pulled up at the asylum and parted ways after getting through the security check point. He headed up to the directors office and she to hers. For better or worse, she was most likely going to be the Joker's doctor. She had recognized that fight in Wayne's eyes. He may have told her not to hold out hope that he was only one man but she knew he was going to get it done. Fridays were her days to catch up on any paperwork or planning she wanted to do for sessions. She settled in and started to do research on the Joker. While she believed there was sincerity in his pleas to her, she had no doubt it wouldn't stop his attempts to manipulate her during a session.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is brought to you by the letters F and U directed at my laptop for deciding to be helpful and erase the unsaved chapter when I was about half way through. Had to write it twice!


	5. First session

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please feel free to skip my little Ted talk here. I've always found it extremely problematic when shows/movies for lack of a better term romanticize police brutality. Most cop shows do the troupe where the hero of the show slaps around a particularly bad "villian" which the end justifies the means because that act of violence got them the answer they needed. In no way do I support terrorism but I do use some platforms like policy brutality as a way to not only have him manipulate Harleen but to bring a depth to the Joker that I feel like we don't get very often from cannon its just oh he likes murder and graveyard humor.

Harleen had been correct. Once Bruce Wayne got that look in his eyes it seemed like the world fell at his feet to comply. Before the end of the day she received a visit from the director letting her know that for better or worse the Joker was now her patient. With a stern look at her he dropped off the additional source materials that had been provided to Arkham after Dr. Fitzpatrick's meeting with the Joker at Black Gate. He reminded her that having a high profile case like the Joker would not excuse her from regular patient meetings and paperwork. She gave a sharp nod at the director a little offended that he would felt the need to call that out but decided he was probably feeling petty that she had gone around him to another board member. Honestly she was lucky she wasn't getting additional work loaded on as a punishment for bringing up her concerns to Mr. Wayne. 

She had already seen a good majority of the news stories surrounding the Joker and had re-watched them during her shift while waiting for the official confirmation that she would be the therapist treating the joker. She buckled in for a long night popping down to the staff room to make herself a cup of noodles before heading back to her office. For security reasons since the Joker's files contained copies of the official police reports she was not allowed to take the materials home with her to review. Since she had the news stories fresh in her head she decided to start with the police reports and interviews and then move over to his stay at Black gate including behavior records and that final interview that had got him moved over to Arkham. 

She wasn't sure whether to be horrified or impressed by everything in the police reports. Not with the actions of the Joker, those were all pretty cut and dry bad but the actions of the police. Commissioner Gordon admitted flat out in his report that he left the Joker alone with a vigilante who then physically abused the suspect. She wasn't sure if it was because he felt like he had a responsibility to record that he purposely violated policy and that mistake needed to be put in the official records or if he was so comfortable with the known corruption of the police department that he knew he could add something like that to the report and no one would do anything. Then again if the behavior directed at the Joker here at Arkham was any indication even if the police weren't corrupt it seemed unlikely that anyone would bat an eye at the Joker being abused in custody. 

There was a detailed report of the death of Rachel Dawes and she realized that must be who Mr. Wayne had compared her too. Over all there wasn't much to go on in the reports. The police hadn't gotten much out of the Joker most of it was information commissioner Gordon had gotten from the batman. The information was now considered compromised due to the fact that batman was now a wanted criminal himself. She moved on to the first reports of his stay at Black Gate. He was admitted to the prisons infirmary first thing. Injuries from his fight with batman in addition to a dangerous pooling of blood in his head from extended time hanging up side down. Again courtesy of the batman. For a man that doesn't believe in killing the criminals he goes up against he sure doesn't seem to mind leaving them in life threatening conditions. The report from Black gate was small. The majority of it minor incidents. Much like his stay at Arkham it's hard getting into mischief when you are being watched 24/7. 

She moved on to the report from the physicist that spoke to the Joker at Black Gate and froze. She re-read it twice to make sure she wasn't starting to hallucinate from exhaustion. She took off her fake glasses and rubbed her eyes with gentle strokes moving the fingers of her right hand up to pinch the bridge of her nose. Eventually a giggle escaped past her lips quickly escalating into full blown laughter that she tried desperately to control. The joker had managed to get transferred to Arkham by plagiarizing Disney movies. It was clear that the Doctor doing the evaluation did not have children. First he started by calling himself Jiminy Cricket. That reference the doctor recognized but as the Joker moved into more current Disney movies the doctor ate it right up. Was raised by an abusive step-parent after their beloved parent died in an unfortunate incident while scuba diving. He taught himself martial arts and joined the military to go on the overseas tour his father was supposed to take before his sudden death, a desperate attempt to reclaim his families honor. 

For better or worse indeed thought Harleen. At least now she had her answer. She was almost positive that the Joker was mentally sound or at least as mentally sound as a terrorist was able of being. She was also certain that the Joker would attempt to manipulate her during these meetings. She vowed that she would go into them with her eyes peeled and take any sob story worth a grain of salt. She would do her best to help him but she would be damned if she would let him get to her. 

Harleen packed up her bag and made her way downstairs to the security desk to check out for the night. She had not paid attention to the time when she left her office and was startled when the clock above the security desk showed that it was 2 o'clock in the morning. She would be riding the train with the group exiting last call at the bars. At best people would be fornicating in the rail car, at worse... she shivered not bringing herself to even mentally state her fear. She resigned herself to letting security know that she was going to sleep in her office and take off in the morning. 

"Hello, I'm Dr. Quinzel. I just wanted to let you all know I'll be kipping in my office for the night. Its too late to take the train home." 

"Hey, Doctor, long time no see! I haven't seen you since we were doing those crazy shifts cuz of the Joker. I don't blame you wantin' to stay here for the night. No way a lady like you should be taking the train this time of night! Oh hey," He continued smacking his forehead like he had forgotten something, "Frost, this is Dr. Quinzel the one you were asking about. The one that's taking one for the team and doing therapy for the Joker. You became an overnight celebrity Doc!" Harleen gave a strained smile. Gilligan was one of the few guards that had always noticed Harleen no matter how hard she tried to blend in. She was pretty sure that Gilligan was not his actual name but it was what everyone called him even the higher ups. Most likely because he not only resembled the character but acted like him too. 

She turned her attention to the other guard that had been staring at her as if he was trying to figure her out. "Hello, you must be one of our new guards. I'm Dr. Quinzel and you're Frost?" 

"Yes Ma'am." Another contemplative look. "Not to be too forward but I just got off work. If you would like I'm more then happy to give you a ride. My car's not much but it's safer then the train this time at night and I'm sure you would have a better night sleep at home then your office." It was Harleen's turn to give him an appraising look. Under normal circumstances she would never agree in a thousand years. For starters she was not friends or friendly with anyone at work. That was one of the first ways to draw attention to yourself though she supposed that was going to have to change especially if it was all over the place already that she was now Joker's therapist. She also had just met this man and she didn't do well around men period. However, similar to Bruce Wayne earlier there was something about him that made her think that at least in that regard that she was safe with him. Though that was where the similarities to Mr. Wayne ended. There was something dangerous about this man, not necessarily violent like he would lash out, but more like this was a man that knew how to end the fight if it was brought to him and that end would be permanent. 

She realized she had been staring for too long and now both men were looking at her and she blushed deeply. "Thank you, that would be very appreciated. The couch in my office isn't very comfortable and since I don't make a habit of staying over I don't have a change of clothes." She signed the employee logbook and walked out with Frost. She got a weird sensation as he opened the passenger car door for her. A sense of deja vu not necessarily from a previous event but more like in the future, Frost would frequently open doors for her. She mentally laughed to herself and got in the car. 

"I live in the University district. I hope that isn't too far out of your way." 

"Don't worry about that. I wouldn't have offered if I minded. Gilligan made a good point, a lady like you shouldn't be riding the train by herself this time of night." She felt a tick in her cheek at the common saying which he noticed. "Oh hell, and I've offended you. I didn't mean it like that. I'm not trying to blame anyone that's been put in that situation. Just an unfortunate truth of this city. Its not safe for most people to travel alone anymore. I'm glad I'm able to give you a safe way home." As he finished speaking the car settled into an uncomfortable silence for a few minutes. 

"I'm sorry, I'd turn on the radio but it doesn't work. I've had this car since highschool. Its pretty much a hunk of junk at this point." 

"That's okay, I rarely listen to music. And I'm sorry." 

"Don't be, believe me I get it. My wife would have jumped down my throat for the way I phrased that." His eyes turned a little sad. Harleen could read in his posture and phrasing that his wife wasn't around and by the affection he still had in his voice she could tell it was death and not divorce. Everyone is surrounded by death in this city. All of us have some kind of sob story, I wonder if I'll ever get to hear the Joker's real story. She shock her head, that was a dangerous path to follow especially since she was sure she would be treated to all kinds of sob stories from him all of which would be false. 

As they neared the University district she provided further instructions on how to get to her place. They pulled up to her building and she got out thanking him again for the ride. She got out her keys and she was surprised to see he stayed until the door was shut behind her. Shaking her head she headed up to her apartment. She was determined to enjoy her weekend before going back and starting with the Joker on Monday. 

\------------

The weekend passed much like it always did, speeding through twice as fast as a work day would. Saturdays were her guilty pleasure days. She would do Yoga instead of going to the gym, eat ice cream and snuggle into the coach to watch movies. Sunday's would be spent going to the grocery store and doing any miscellaneous chores that were too time consuming for the regular week. She was on call but thankfully there were no emergency therapy sessions needed and she never received a call from the Asylum asking her to come in. She walked into work Monday feeling a little more refreshed, it seemed that making progress on getting the Joker help and her determination that she was not going to let him mess with her and put a stop to her nightmares. Apparently she was destined to always have that feeling destroyed at work. For the second week in a row as soon as she felt relaxed work was there to ruin it. If she had any doubt about Gilligan's statement on Friday it was gone now. Everyone in the lobby was staring at her. It was clear that everyone had been brought up to speed about her new assignment. A couple of the nurses were even crying which Harleen thought was ridiculous considering the fact she had never had a conversation with any of the crying girls. Less then 5 minutes in the building and she already had a headache. Lovely. 

She walked up to her office after getting through security. For the first time ever security seemed to actually see her and she had to have the wand scan her twice. She wouldn't be surprised if they forced her to be scanned again before she actually spoke to the Joker. She didn't have any appointments before her meeting with the Joker at 9. He would be her first appointment of the day every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. The Joker's file was sitting on her desk where she had left it and she opened it to the very back. The only file she hadn't read yet was Arkham's mainly because she was sure there would be nothing in it that she didn't already know. The Joker was kept under heavy sedation with orderlies the director trusted. She was therefore surprised to see the notes from the Joker's stay in the infirmary when he first arrived. 

She gently read outloud "Patient brought into infirmary with suspected hypothermia. Patient was brought in soaking wet still in his clothes from Black gate. Reason given was that they had to have a team of at least four to take him to shower and change and a fourth orderly had not been vetted yet. Patient also developed pneumonia from an untreated case of influenza." At this point Harleen could not continue and tears were streaming down his face. She remembered the storms from the night the Joker was brought in. At the time she hadn't made the connection between him being transported in that storm and his trip not two days later to the infirmary. She thought back to the scene she witnessed Last Tuesday. The basement had been freezing even two months later in March. She couldn't imagine what it had been like in January. That's what had grabbed her attention. It had amazed her that it was warm enough to downpour though the rain had been so cold that even a couple of minutes in it had hurt. She couldn't imagine getting caught in that and left in a cell in that freezing basement. She also didn't recall seeing a blanket down there either. Not that he would have had the physical ability to tuck himself in with the drugs he was being injected with. Her vow on Friday forgotten she sat there until it was time to go to her session with him. Thinking how could she ever make this right?

\------------------------  
At 5 til 9 Harleen gathered the supplies she would need for a session with Joker. Arkham asylum wasn't nearly as big as it looked from the outside and it only took her a couple of minutes to get down to the meeting room. The basement did not have a therapy room so the Joker was being brought up to one on the second floor where traditionally the rest of the dangerous patients received treatment. Harleen's office was on the third floor almost directly above what would be her and the Joker's meeting room. She used the spare 3 minutes to get set up making sure the tape recorder was ready, until Joker proved himself to be trustworthy she wasn't allowed to have pencils or pens in the room with him. 

She could hear them walking down the hall and she sat down. She didn't want to look like she had been pacing. The orderlies would be sure to report any nervous behavior to the director. And then he was there, being led in with chains connected to cuffs and shackles on his feet. She had heard that he was too good at getting out of the straight jacket so they had simply given up putting him in it. The drugs keeping him usually docile enough that it wasn't needed anyway. She could see that he was drugged though he looked like he was walking fine and seemed more or less alert. More like someone that gave up coffee for lent then someone that had spent the last 2 months being injected repeatedly with grade A sedatives. The orderlies got him chained to the chair without a word but gave her glares on their way out. Apparently they were not happy with the changes with the Joker's care if it could be called care. She gave a glare right back and had to force herself not to stick out her tongue as they left the room. 

She turned back to her patient and gave him a soft smile. "Hello Mr. Cricket. How are you today?" At first he looked confused but then he smiled and gave a chuckle. 

"Did you, ah, like my interview with Dr. Fitzpatrick?" 

"I think I liked the story better when I was watching, Pinocchio, Cinderella, Finding Nemo and Mulan." She let out a giggle that she told herself she wouldn't do and his answering smile lit up his face making the scars stretch even further truly making it look like he was grinning from ear to ear. 

"You know, ah, I do an awesome retelling of bambi. One of the best Disney movies out there. That moment, ah, that moment where his mother is killed by the hunter. Funniest fucking thing I've ever seen. Right up there with when Voldemort ties to kill a baby and fails." She could tell he was trying to make her uncomfortable. His speech had been broken up with him licking his lips and pushing out his scars. He would also let off tiny giggles that were faked. Not the true giggling of a mad man unable to control himself.

"All joking aside" He gave a genuine smile at that. Hmm his eyes crinkle when its genuine. "I can't call you Mr. Cricket and I'm not supposed to call you Joker either. Aliases are frowned upon." His smile disappeared at that. 

"Tell me something doc. Have you ever heard the concept of a dead name?"

"Yes, Trans* individuals frequently use the phrase to refer to the name given to them by their parents at birth that no longer fits to how they identify, the person they are inside. The name should be considered dead and not used again."

"That's how I feel about my birth name, its not just about an alias. I'm not that person anymore. He died a long time ago." 

"And how did he die?" She asked gently. 

He smiled and this time it was easy to see it wasn't genuine " He wished for power and unfortunately he got it." 

Harleen sighed but then smiled "That's Aladdin." She paused to think. Pushing the name issue was not going to get them anywhere but she refused to call him by his inmate number as they insisted on doing in staff meetings on the rare occasion he had been brought up. "How would you feel about a compromise?" He gave an arched brow to let her know he was listening. "Would Mr. J work for you?" He thought about it and gave a nod. Their hour almost up he asked if they could cut it early. 

"I'm still being weened off the hard stuff. They are going to try me on something else but they have to wait until the rest of this junk is out of my system. I'm still getting tired really easily." She quickly agreed and pushed the button to let the orderlies know that they were ready for the Joker to be escorted back.


	6. And the waltz goes on

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A couple more of Joker's therapy sessions and Harleen get's a nasty phone call

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I forgot to add this to the previous chapter. I referenced dead names and provided a brief description based on my understanding of the term. If I've done a poor job or if I've accidentally offended please let me know as that is not my intention. I've always read the Joker as being slightly non-binary, my joker still identifies as male but as the kind of guy that wears make up, paints his nails, maybe wears some lingerie or female identified costumes and doesn't give a shit about what that says about his masculinity or sexuality to other people.

Harleen's next session was the Joker was on Wednesday. She was still kicking herself for how much she had laughed during the previous session. The man gets off on killing people that's his brand of humor so what does that say about you that you're laughing? But I'm not really laughing about him killing others, she justified to herself mentally, honestly if you think about it compared to some of the routes he could have taken to get here, painting his life as a Disney movie was rather wholesome. She snorted that can't be a thought anyone has ever had about the Joker before. 

Like before she was sitting down and had the room already set up when he came in. She would need to account for the fact that several minutes would always be taken up by him being strapped down and made a mental note to factor that in to any planning she did for their sessions. Not that she had really stuck to a plan last time. The joker thrived on chaos and trying to stick to a plan seemed like the best way to get the Joker to purposely try to overthrow the session. 

"Good Morning, Mr. J, I see here that they have you on the new medication now. Does it seem to be working better for you?"

"It's better but not great, I don't ah, like being medicated. Reminds me of the time I had to live in a church."

"Hunchback of Notre Dame, nice try." He gave another one of those smiles that wasn't quite genuine. "speaking of, what made you use Disney movies to get transferred? No offense but nothing in that file should have gotten you transferred here." 

"The doctor had made up his mind before he even got in the room that I, ah, was bat shit crazy." She snorted, did he just make a bat pun? "I figured that eventually batman or our, ah, beloved commissioner is going to read that file and make the same connections as you. Except you actually seem to have a sense of humor about it."

"I really shouldn't be laughing. Though I must say I like this brand of your humor much better then the kind that involves rigging stuff to blow up." He rolled his eyes at that. 

"Don't worry so much about not supposed to." This time she rolled her eyes. 

"I like my life and my job, so you'll have to forgive me for still somewhat caring about the not supposed to's of the world." He rolled his eyes again and she noticed when he did so that her didn't really roll his eyes the same way most people did more like he rolled his eyes up and left them there while waiting for his annoyance to pass. It almost reminded her of a anger management technique. Like he was counting to ten in his head. 

"So back to the original topic, other then the fact that you just don't like being medicated, is there anything else that has you concerned about the new medication? Any side effects that you've noticed?" 

"I'm lethargic, its not enough to put me to sleep like the last one did but I still don't have the strength to be very active. I'm going to start getting chubby soon. Also I've noticed I don't get an erection in the mornings anymore. I'm not super concerned about that but figured I needed to still list it as a side effect for you." She squeaked and a blush painted itself across her face. She could also feel her hands trembling and slipped them off the table so he wouldn't see that they had started to curl in. That was not something she was expecting him to say. "Sorry doc, wasn't trying to make you uncomfortable, just felt like it was something that was needed for the records just in case." He didn't sound very sincere and she glared at him. She felt like she had just failed some kind of test or worse had confirmed something to him. 

"I apologize, your response surprised me is all. I was not expecting that side effect. Its not very common with this drug but its also not unheard of." They both lapsed into silence her's embarrassed that she let him get a reaction like that from her and his contemplative. His previous assessment confirmed, PTSD was definitely caused by some sort of sexual assault. While that had helped him get these sessions it would most likely work against him as well. So far she had seemed mostly at ease with him but he had noticed that especially when the orderlies were in the room her lips would pinch slightly, her eyes would dull, and there would be that tremor in her hands. She probably wasn't even aware of it but obviously at least one of them reminded her of her attacker. They spent the rest of the session that way, both looking off into other ends of the room thinking. 

\---------------------  
The days between sessions with the Joker seemed to crawl. He was currently her only patient that received sessions three times a week meaning her previous catch up day of Friday would now also contain a session with the Joker. All of her previous patients had been low risk. They were there due to violent crimes but they had proven that with medication and therapy to be safe. Arkham mainly employed male doctors as an additional back up to the orderlies. Better to have someone in there that had a better chance of fighting off a violent patient until the orderlies could get them subdued. While she could understand why this was slightly problematic, she didn't protest since it worked in her favor. Arkham had a zero tolerance policy about female doctors treating patients that had a history of sexual/domestic violence against women. It was one of the reasons she choose Arkham despite the high risk of most of the patients. Though that had not done her favors when speaking to the Joker and was one of the reasons her reaction had been so visible. Most of the patients she dealt with were women that had killed their abusers and reacted badly to male doctors. 

When she got home Thursday night she was on edge. She had this feeling like something was about to go very wrong. She shook it off the best she could and heated up some left over pasta turning on the tv and keeping her phone on hand since she was on call. She had whose line is it anyway on. Colin was giving a press conference and the reporters were giving him hints on who he was supposed to be. The caption telling the audience that he was batman coming out of the closet and Harleen snorted. She wondered if batman ever saw these kinds of things. Its not like he could sue since trademarking batman would mean revealing who he was behind the mask. 

Harleen muted the tv as her phone started to ring. She didn't recognize the number but figured that whoever was responsible for phoning the doctor on call had used a cell phone instead of the landline to call her it was against policy but she wasn't too concerned about it, everyone makes mistakes. 

"Doctor. Quinzel speaking." 

"Hey baby, its soo good to hear your voice. You never call your daddy anymore. I miss you. I miss every part of you." She froze too horrified to hang up the phone. He was obviously drunk and was trying to turn this into phone sex with his now grown daughter. "You know I figured out where you live. I could come over and tuck you in like I use to." At that she finally found the strength to hang up the phone. She ran to the windows and doors to make sure they were all locked. She was a couple floors up and she was positive her father didn't have the ability to jump high enough to pull down the ladder for the fire escape especially with how intoxicated he had sounded but to her fear clouded mind it didn't matter. The fact that there was a lock to get into the building also didn't cut through the fear. She spent the rest of the night clutching a kitchen knife curled against the couch on the floor crying. Only getting up occasionally to continue throwing up or to rechecked that everything was locked up tight. All lights in the apartment stayed on and she did not get a single moment of sleep. In the morning she dressed as quickly as possible. She couldn't bring herself to get in the shower and headed off to work. She stopped by the coffee shop on her way in again and made her way to the train. The entire time keeping her eyes peeled for a sign that her father really was stalking out her place. She didn't see anything but she still spilled most of her coffee from the shaking in her hands. 

\-------------  
He noticed it as soon as he was led into the therapy room. The recorder wasn't on like it was supposed to be, her eyes were the dullest he had ever seen them and her hands were curled inward sitting on her lap and shaking. She was so out of it she wasn't doing nearly as well as she usually did hiding and he could tell even the orderlies had noticed. 

"Not still mad at me about our last session are you doc? I know I was a little mean but I promise to be on my best behavior this time." Her eyes cleared up a little and while she couldn't uncurl her hands she did at least stick them in her pockets to hide them from view. It wasn't a perfect cover but the orderlies weren't exactly smart. They would be happy to believe that her lapse was Joker related. They got him chained in and left the room. He took a deep breath and exhaled. He was the last person that should be baby sitting someone that is having a mental health crisis. 

"You really shouldn't have come in, I don't know what happened and honestly its none of my business but its obvious that you are not well." 

"I" She cleared her throat, " I didn't feel safe at my apartment, and honestly if I called off after two sessions with you they'd take the case away from me and I don't think they would assign you to someone else. My issues don't get to mess with my patients well being and having you be removed from these sessions would not be in the interest of your well being." He sighed, in some ways he almost felt touched. 

"Doc, don't turn on the tape recorder. If they ask tell them I refused to talk today, that I was feeling moody and you decided to save the battery and have me do meditation. Which is what I would honestly recommend for you. Did you even sleep last night?"

"No" She started shaking, last night was the first time in years she had full body shakes she had done a lot to get herself where only her hands would still slightly tremble and now for the second time in less then twenty four hours she couldn't control the shakes running down her body. "I'm so very sorry about this, these sessions are supposed to be about you not me." 

"Listen doc, ah, you should never feel like you have to apologize for taking care of your mental health. Like I said what you're going through is none of my business but I can guess at least some of it." She let out a quiet sob at that, " Its obvious, ah, that you have some sort of PTSD. I'm not great with the feelings stuff but if you need to talk." He surprised even himself with that offer. He wasn't willing to deal with his own shit let alone someone else's. He licked his lips and pushed at his scar. He wasn't completely making the tick up though he did it on purpose on occasion to scare people. 

"That would not be professional, and while I know your feelings on that, its not something I'm willing to talk about with a patient. It was sweet of you to offer." She gathered herself a bit "Is there anything you need to talk about today?" 

"Nah doc, how about we do that meditation thing." She nodded. He sat there pretending he didn't notice her quietly crying. He knew he should be using this time to manipulate her but he couldn't quite bring himself to do it. He managed to convince himself that it was because of a lack of challenge and not actual concern for the sweet doctor. He added to his assessment of her. This was not a one time assault, this was someone that had been broken to her very core and had rebuilt herself on a shaky foundation, he would guess that her abuser was also trying to get back in touch. Doctor Quinzel was too controlled to let anything but sheer terror bring her to this point. 

He got her attention at 5 minutes before the session was supposed to end so she could get herself somewhat cleaned up. The non-session seemed to do her some good. She looked more in control of herself then she had previously. Her eyes were not quite as glass like, and her hands while still shaking were no longer curled in hugging her body. The orderlies unhooked him and got him ready to move back downstairs with Doctor Quinzel walking out behind them. She was stopped before she could get in the elevator being gently reminded that only the orderlies were allowed to be in that compact of a space with him. She decided to take the stairs up so she didn't have to spend anymore time in the hall way. She passed Frost but didn't think anything of it still lost in her own little world. She and the orderlies both missing the Joker catch Frost's eyes and glance meaningfully at the doctor. Frost had his new orders, he would be looking after the doctor for the time being.


	7. Frost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frost helps out and we get more inside on what caused him to become Joker's right hand man not that Harleen knows about that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay everyone, I have the story more or less plotted out but I'm still working on thinking out the filler chapters to develop Joker and Harley's relationship realistically. This chapter doesn't have Joker in it. Its building the friendship between Frost and Harleen which will be important as the story goes on. I want to make it clear that Frost has not/will not have a sexual relationship with Joker or Harley. More like they adopt him as an asexual best friend that they cuddle on especially when they are fighting.

Harleen didn't get anything else done for the rest of the day. The meditation had helped calm her down enough that she locked her door when she got back to her office and slept for the rest of her shift not waking up until after all of the day staff had gone home. She thankfully had her paperwork up to date for once and had originally planned to plot out therapy sessions for the next week after her session with the Joker. She looked at the clock and sighed it was already 10 o'clock. She really didn't want to go home but she didn't have anywhere else to stay. She looked back down to the coach she had been sleeping on and sighed. She could already feel the negative effects of sleeping it and she wouldn't be allowed to stay the entire weekend anyway. If she was going to force herself to go home it needed to be soon or she would run into the same issue as last week. 

She grabbed her purse and a notepad. She would do her planning at home. It wasn't like she was going to be able to sleep anyway. She dug through the purse for the keys to her office and stepped out to the hallway still sorting through her bag. 

"Dr. Quinzel" She let out a scream and spun around to see Frost standing there. "Oh shit, I'm sorry Doc, I didn't mean to scare you. Are you alright?" She nodded her head. 

"I'm fine, just a little jumpy I guess. I..." She looked around, "Please don't say anything but I accidentally fell asleep. This place is enough to give anyone nightmares sometimes you know?" There that was a perfectly reasonable excuse to be jumpy, one that wouldn't get her in too much trouble if Frost reported it.

"I hear ya, I was actually up here looking for you. I was checking the log book to see who all we still had in the building and saw you hadn't left yet. Wanted to check and see if you wanted a ride home?" 

"I thought you got off around 2, that's when you took me home last week. I don't want you leaving early just to give me a ride. I'll manage."

"I traded shifts. Buddy on the swing shift wanted to make sure he could stay for his daughter's entire birthday party you know. Checking the log book was the last thing I needed to do so Gilligan was all set as soon as he got in. I really don't mind giving you a ride doc. I think what you are doing for the Joker is really kind. Don't get me wrong the guy's a sick fuck, if you'll pardon my french, but what they were doing to him just wasn't right. You're good peoples." He shrugged at her unsure what else to say. 

"I think the two of us are in the minority on that position, but I agree. It was inhumane and I'm not really expecting any favors for doing the right thing. I don't want to take advantage."

"You really wouldn't be doc. I actually don't live too far away from you." She raised an eyebrow. Most of the guards lived in the narrows around the asylum. They were well paid due to the risks they were taking but the job had a high mortality rate and usually only those from the narrows were desperate enough to take the jobs. Opting to stay close to work and their families in the area. " I..." it was his turn to trail off while deciding how much of the truth he wanted to tell her. He took a deep breath and leaned against the wall outside her office. "I"m guessing you figured out that my wife's dead?" She nodded. "She died due to medical malpractice, I got a nice big insurance claim from the hospital and a lifetime worth of nightmares." He sounded bitter when talking about the insurance claim and looked like he was barely holding back tears when talking about nightmares. It was clear how much he had truly loved his wife. 

"I'm so very sorry for your loss. If you are still willing to give me that ride, I'd appreciate it. And Frost, I know we are co-workers which means I can't be your therapist but if you ever need a friend to talk to... well I'm so good at listening I made a job out of it." He laughed a little at her wink. 

"I think this is the beginning of a very good friendship, Dr. Quinzel, now lets get you home." 

\---------------  
The ride was mostly silent. The car making most of the noises but she didn't ask him about it. She figured that if he got a big settlement from his wife's death but still kept this car that it must have a lot of sentimental value. No matter how many times he referred to it as a hunk of junk. The silent felt peaceful, not like it usually did with Harleen struggling to decide if she should be talking or not. Frost for all the slightly dangerous vibes also had a calming effect like God decided to be ornery and make a person of complete contradictions. 

Everything changed when they pulled up in front of her apartment. The beat up old station wagon had the same bumper sticker on it as the last time she laid eyes on it at her undergraduate graduation ceremony. Her brother had still been alive back then and her parents had found the ticket in his back pack and gate crashed the event turning it into a huge scene. It was the last time she ever saw her brother alive. She could clearly see that her father was the one driving the car his hand held out with a cigarette between his fingers. Harleen started to hyperventilate, there was no oxygen in the car. How was she going to explain this, how was she going to get inside safely? How was she supposed to function knowing that her father was right outside even if she did make inside safe? Through the sea of thoughts she vaguely heard someone calling her. If they had been calling her by anything else it may not have gotten through the fog. 

"Dr. Quinzel, Dr. Quinzel, hey what's wrong?" She turned to look at him trembling.

"I can't stay here. Can you take me to a motel or something? And can you help me make sure that guy isn't following us?" She pointed to the station wagon. There was no way she decided, that she was going into that building. At best she spent the rest of the weekend curled up in a fetal position scared out of her mind. At worst he got to her. She gave a full body shudder. Maybe if she was lucky Frost would just think that it was a creepy ex-boyfriend. 

Her father got out of the car and started to head over. He was trying to make it look casual as if he wasn't checking to see if she was in the car and who she was with. Frost looked between the guy and her saying nothing and pulling away. She saw her father jump back in his car to attempt following them but Frost was surprisingly good at losing their tail. At one point even looping back around to her building. From there they only went a couple of blocks before pulling up in front of a town home usually rented by the professors that taught at Gothom University. He pulled the car into the garage and closed the garage door behind them. 

"Not to sound ungrateful but where are we?"

"My place, I figured that guy looked like bad news and you shouldn't have to stay at some shit hole motel to get away from him. You said we were friends and I take care of my friends." 

"You really don't have to..." She trailed off as he gave her the look. It had been a long time since she had the sort of friend that gave her that look. Equal parts 'disapproving parent' mixed with 'you're an adorable idiot'. 

"I should have some stuff here that will fit you. It will give you a chance to shower before bed. Don't worry, its not my wife's I donated her clothes a while ago." He walked upstairs to the lofted bedroom and pulled out a batman onsie that wouldn't completely drown her and an unopened pack of men's boxers. Both the items were clearly not Frost's size but she shrugged. It really wasn't any of her business and she was feeling grimy after not showering that morning. A shower would be lovely. He showed her to the bathroom. "Just call down if you need anything, I think I have a safety pin somewhere if the boxers won't stay up. I'm going to make us some dinner. How do tacos sound?" Harleen sniffled "Nope none of that, I'm still a guy after all I don't do waterworks." And like that she laughed instead and gave him a light shove. 

"I love tacos" She gathered the clothes in her arms to head to the bathroom, making sure to confirm that extra towels were in the bathroom. 

She could still somewhat hear him moving about downstairs. At one point she even thought she heard him on the phone. It wasn't perfect but she made do with the 3-in-1 shampoo and body wash in the bathroom. Considering all Frost was doing for her, she wasn't going to act like a brat and complain about his choice of shower products. 

She toweled off and pulled on the boxers. They were loose but they should at least stay on. She only had to roll the sleeves and legs of the onsie once. She headed down from the loft bedroom and into the kitchen/dinning area. Frost had already made good progress on the food cooking the meat and was starting to cut up the vegetables. 

"would you like some help?"

He looked up, "sure, can you start dicing the tomato?" She nodded and together they completed getting dinner ready. He held up some wine as a question and she nodded her head yes. 

They ate at the small table and worked together afterwards to clean up the kitchen. Neither were tired yet since he was used to the night shift and she had slept for hours in her office. The moved over to the coach bringing the wine with them. 

"Thank you for all of this" Harleen said quietly. " I don't normally like to get others involved in my drama but I can't deny I'm so very grateful that you were there. I don't know what I would have done if I had been by myself." 

He hesitated, "May I ask you a question?" She braced herself and nodded, "I noticed some similarities, I'm assuming he's your father?" She nodded and he cursed softly. She took a gulp of her wine. "I don't know the story but no kid should be as scared of their parent as you are of him. You have a safe place here whenever you need it. And you're staying here until we think of a game plan." 

"Do you have any kids?" He's expression closed off for a moment before he relaxed again. 

"That was what my wife's malpractice suit was about. She died giving birth because the doctor that delivered was high. He killed her and the baby both." Harleen's eye's went wide in horror. "He didn't even serve any prison time, his brother's some big wig mob guy, got him off and paid off the malpractice suit." The bitterness was back in his voice and Harleen set her wine glass down and reached over and gave him a hug. It was the first deliberate touch she had given a guy in years. He gave her a hug back. 

"I think we need to cheer up." He walked over to a closet and pulled out monopoly and shook the box. 

"You are so going down." She responded back. They only managed to play the one game. Frost winning due to an aggressive strategy that had Harleen pouting. It was going on 4 in the morning. They had paused the game around 1 to make some left over tacos to munch on. 

"You coming up to bed?" She froze. 

"Oh, um..." It hadn't occurred to her that there wasn't a guest room and she started to panic. His gaze turned briefly to stone making connections in his head that she didn't want him to make. 

"You are welcome to sleep on the coach but I guarantee the bed is infinitely safer and much more comfortable." She calmed down, maybe it was hearing about his wife and how much he loved her or the fact that he had men's clothes that obviously were not his in his closet, or then again it could be that over the night they had made such fast friends that she actually felt safe with him. Safe enough to trust him not to have other motives. She followed him up the the bedroom. She put her glasses on the night stand and crawled under the blanket. He ducked into the bathroom to change and came out in sleep shorts and a wife beater shirt, taking note of how she was sleeping he slipped between the sheets hoping the layer between them would help her feel safer. It was a little awkward at first when they turned off the lights. 

"Hey doc, you awake" 

She turned to look at him, "of course I'm still awake and you can call me Harleen. Its really weird to be having a sleepover with someone who calls me doc."

He laughed, "I'm John by the way, or Jonny to some of my friends. I noticed something weird about your eyes, usually they are this unreal glass blue color but I noticed around the time we were heading inside when I was giving you that look, they turned this really pretty steel blue. Have they always done that?"

"Yeah, they've always done that." The conversation died off and they both fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really bad about stealing quotes from movies and forgetting to give credit. Last chapter the line about don't worry so much about not supposed to comes from chocolat (awesome movie, its one of my favorite Johnny Deep movies though he doesn't really have that big a part in it) in this chapter I also reference victor/victoria the line about Frost's bed being infinitely safer and more comfortable.


	8. Weekend with Frost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harleen spends the weekend with Frost. Although he feels bad about it Frost starts the manipulation of Harleen to help out his friend and boss the Joker.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sooo freaking mad. I couldn't figure out why my posts were not updating with the current date apparently you have to manually change the date when filling out the chapter info. I even sent something to the help/ticket desk thing. I'm feeling really dumb. 
> 
> Also the eye color thing is going to be very important in case you were wondering why it keeps coming up.

Frost was already out of the bed when Harleen woke up and she could smell coffee and breakfast downstairs. She followed the smell of bacon down from the loft and practically tackled Frost in excitement due to the spread he had laid out. Harleen could only cook certain dishes and French toast and bacon were definitely out of her wheel house. She always burnt the bacon and she could never get the egg mixture right for the french toast. She was lucky if she could make scrambled eggs without an egg shell getting in the dish. 

They loaded up their dishes and went to the table. Frost waiting until she was about half way through her food before talking to her. 

"Have you given any thought on what you want to do about your father?" She stopped eating and started to push the food around her plate. He noticed that her eyes had shifted back to their glass like color. He had never heard of someone's eyes changing with their emotions like that. 

"I'm not sure what I can do." She shrugged helplessly, "I have no evidence of the abuse, my mother made sure of that. So that rules out an order of protection not that I really expect one of those to be enforced in Gothom. The last time this happened my brother kept an eye on my dad's movements so I could move apartments. I wound up leaving behind a lot of stuff, just moved the essentials and started over as much as possible. Thankfully my parents live out in bludhaven, so its a little easier to get lost in the city. I don't know how the hell he found me this time or got my number for that matter."

He sighed, "I have to admit, I'm not too sure how to help you either short of breaking his legs. Which by the way I would be willing to do." He gave her a dead serious look. And she shook her head. 

"I don't want anyone getting in trouble for me. I have a feeling that now that batman killed Dent vigilantism is going to receive harder sentencing. That's not fair to you." 

"I have some friends that may be able to help out. Its not a long term solution but if you don't mind staying with me for a little while my friends can help keep an eye out while we get you some essentials from your apartment. As adorable as you look in a batman onsie, I have a feeling you'd be more comfortable in your own clothes. That plus the owner of that onsie is going to be less then enthusiastic that I let someone borrow it."

"Oh Frost, I couldn't possibly..." He gave her the adorable idiot look again. 

"Just chip in on groceries and we're square. I'm going to go call my friends to see if they are available to help." Harleen's eyes were back to that vibrant color and she asked if he was done with his food which he nodded yes for already dialing and heading up to the loft for some privacy. Harleen set about putting the left overs away and cleaning up the dishes and kitchen. Frost was right, her staying here wasn't a long term solution eventually she was sure the owner of the onsie would be back and Frost would like his privacy back. But in the mean time she would be forever grateful. She was sure that Frost had saved her life one way or another she did not believe she would have made it out of an encounter with her father alive and sane. 

She was just wrapping up cleaning the counter tops when Frost came back downstairs. "They're in, do you have suitcases that you can pack up with at your apartment or would you like to borrow some?" 

"I have some at the apartment."

"They are going to go ahead of us and check out that he isn't stalking out your place again. You and I will be responsible for packing up what you are going to need at your place. If he comes by after we are already at the apartment Murphy and chuck..." he coughed, "and chuck will scare him off. I described the car he was in. Do your parents have a second car?"

"Not that I'm aware of" 

"Good, that will make this easier. Its going to take them a little bit to get to your apartment and scout the area, they will give us a call when the coast is clear. In the mean time I recommend we make sure they are ready when they call." 

"I'll make a check list of everything I know I'm going to want."

"Good idea, and make sure you pack enough that we won't have to go back there until we figure out a solution." She nodded her head and started making lists. 

\-----------------  
Getting into her apartment was easy. Chuck and Murphy certainly were not the kind of men that she expected Frost to be friends with both men were even larger then he was and where Frost's air of danger seemed to be one of necessity these two didn't seem to have any other layers. At first they eyed her suspiciously but after a glare from Frost they kept their eyes focused as a look out. Frost did most of the back and forth to the car with her bags as she packed. Thankfully most of her clothes were bland enough that they could be mixed and matched for work allowing for her to take a similar amount of outfits. Frost laughed when he saw her pickachu slippers that she was bringing. "keep laughing and I'll shove them so far up your ass the only thing you'll be able to say is pika pika". 

After an hour she had the essentials and had cleared out the fridge so the food wouldn't go bad. The neighbor across the hall was a struggling single mom and the food that wasn't open yet was given to her. Harleen asking her to keep an eye out on the apartment while she was gone and asking her to call the cops if any men came asking for her no matter what their story was. And giving a significant look at the woman's daughter advising her to absolutely not let him in the apartment. 

Harleen took one last look around the apartment and her gaze fell on a little stuffed cat she had for years. She didn't need it but she couldn't help remembering how it had made her feel safe even in the most hopeless of situations. Her thoughts turned to the Joker and she grabbed the cat. He would probably think it was silly but she felt like she owed him some comfort back after he was so understanding about their session on Friday. The cat couldn't really be considered dangerous and she was sure she could get director Bartholomew to allow the Joker to have the cat. She would like to get the Joker some better privileges but until he showed greater progress and behaved himself longer then a week that wasn't going to happen. 

They finished loading up the car and Chuck and Morphy confirmed that her father hadn't been spotted. They stayed behind as Harleen and Frost drove off making sure that no one was tailing them and then heading off in the opposite direction their job done. 

\---------  
It didn't take them long to get everything in the house. Frost packing up the mystery guys clothes and putting it in the coat closet downstairs. 

"I don't mean to pry but is he going to get mad that you have some girl living with you?" 

"Nah, once I explain the situation, he'll be glad I did it. Besides, he and I aren't dating." She gave him a bewildered look at that. "At least not in the normal sense, he and I don't consider it dating. More like platonic cuddling between dudes. He's the one that got my shit together after my wife died. Gave me a new purpose, I owe him my life. I've never wanted anyone other then my wife. From the time I was 16 she was it. But all humans even the most fucked up need some human interaction. He's in a similar boat, not really interested in sex but still every once in awhile just wants someone he can have contact with that isn't going to bite him in the ass. If that makes sense?"

"I'm not so great at the whole touch thing, I have to be in just the right frame of mind. But I can get where you are coming from. I'm glad you guys are able to offer each other that comfort. And if the two of you don't consider yourselves as dating then that is the only thing that matters. So what's his name? Do you think I'll get to meet him." Frost froze and blinked for a moment.

"His name is Jo and I'm not sure he will be able to stop by anytime soon. Most likely we'll have you sorted and gone before he's able to get here." 

"Oh, okay. Well even if I'm sorted and gone I'd still like to meet him. He sounds wonderful." 

"He can rub people the wrong way but he can also be a really good guy." It only took them about an hour to get her settled in. By the time they were getting done he needed to leave and get to work. As security he had a slightly different job schedule to Harleen who only worked Monday-Friday unless she was on call. Which she wasn't that weekend. He made sure she could operate his tv and gave his blessing to finish off the tacos with a huge sigh. Her giggles following him out the garage door. He felt a little bad about leaving her alone but he could not lose this job. 

When the boss was moved to the asylum they lost contact which they had been expecting but when almost two months had gone by without contact they knew something was wrong. It never took the boss that much time to flip someone to work for him. As much as he trusted Frost he would never allow anyone to have complete run of the empire without him. Always making sure he had ways to get orders out to his men even during a period where they were all supposed to lay low. Frost being the most respectable of the crew got a job at the Asylum working security. It didn't take him long to find out the situation his boss was in and start working to find a way to communicate with him. He couldn't move up the Joker's escape time table without an explicit order to do so. 

Then like a miracle Dr. Quinzel had happened and all of the sudden he's medication was swapped out to something that would be much less effective on the boss and he was outside of his cell three times a week. He was still watched to the point that most communication was near impossible but thankfully he had been working with the boss long enough that a few simple gestures were enough for Frost to understand his orders. For example he's orders in regards to Dr. Quinzel. Frost wondered how much the joker knew about the doctor's situation. Frost was already becoming quite fond of the girl though he was prepared to do what needed to be done for the boss. He was hoping that the boss would manage to get her to join up so to speak and she wouldn't become collateral damage for the eventual break out. 

\---------------------  
When Frost got to Arkham all hell had broken loose. Apparently the Joker had been left in a scalding hot shower handcuffed to the rails. He had severe burns over his body and all the board of directors were in the building and interrogation was being done for all the orderlies assigned to the Joker. 

"Yo, Gilligan, cover for me. If they haven't called Dr. Quinzel yet they are going to and I don't want her riding the rails by herself." Their conversation caught the attention of one of the board members. 

"I think that's a great idea. Bruce Wayne." He stuck his hand out and Frost shook it. "You have permission to go get her. I think she'll want to be here for this. Please let her know that I'm here so she doesn't feel like she needs to rush that I'll be sure that action is being taken for this gross abuse of her patient." Frost nodded and swung out the door getting back in his car. The 20 minute drive taking 10 minutes. He ran back into the apartment to see Harleen asleep on the coach in a night shirt. He gently shook her awake, her eyes dull and she jerked away from him. 

"Sorry, but you need to wake up. The Joker was assaulted and is in critical but stable condition in the asylum's infirmary. He was left in a scalding hot shower and has some rather severe burns. Bruce Wayne said to let you know he was there to make sure that action was being taken but he was sure you would want to be there too." Her eyes had cleared and instead of the vibrant steel he was used to them becoming they instead turned a fierce ice. 

Harleen rushed upstairs not even bothering to go into the bathroom to change she stripped out of the night shirt and put on a bra. Pulling out one of the few dresses she had brought with her she pulled it over her head and slipped on some ballet flats. Within 10 minutes she was ready not even pulling on her glasses. She grabbed the cat sitting beside them instead. Putting the cat into her normal work purse she was racing out to met with Frost in the car. 

Frost gave her what little details he had that it was suspected that the orderlies had done this on purpose and were being interviewed by the directors but were essentially closing ranks stating that the joker did not tell them that the water was too hot and that they thought they were giving him a reward for being good that week by giving him extra shower time. Harleen was so mad that Frost wouldn't have been surprised if she grew fangs and started hissing. 

"I don't trust them, not one bit. They've been closing ranks about the abuse done to the Joker since I started looking into his case. The hypothermia and pneumonia right after he was admitted, the sedatives being given even when he was cooperating, and I've not said anything but I've noticed a bruise or two as well. Or there have been times he's looked a little stiff but I didn't mention it." It was Frost's turn to look angry. 

"They need someone else other then the director's orderlies holding them accountable. I know this is crossing a line but do you think you could convince the board to have me and Gilligan as part of the Joker's detail. The orderlies would still be there for the medical aspect but having someone not controlled by the director would help remind them that they are being watched. 

"Frost, I think that's a brilliant idea! We'll need to find someone else as well since the two of you can't cover the Joker 24/7 but if I get Mr. Wayne involved I'm sure that we can find someone else as well that's trust worthy."

They made it to the Asylum in 15 minutes. Frost had wanted to go faster but Harleen had started to turn as green as her dress. They were greeted at the door by Mr. Wayne's butler Alfred who led them in to were the board was still questioning the orderlies. Frost stayed back with Alfred while Harleen went up to the table with Mr. Wayne. He got up cutting off the questioning while he pulled her seat out for her. She gave him a small smile and the questioning resumed. In the end it was decided that the orderlies that were assigned to be on duty that evening with the Joker would be suspended for two weeks without pay. Harleen was furious, they could have killed her patient and their punishment was two weeks off even if it was without pay. They should have at least been fired if not facing assault charges. She stood up and came around the table so she could face the board of directors. 

"I think we can all agree that this was a serious abuse of our patients trust and well being. I would like to propose that a couple members of the security team be at least temporarily if not a permanently assigned to the Jokers detail to make sure there are no retaliation for the consequences that the orderlies are facing. I would like to propose Frost and Gilligan for the time being and Mr.Wayne I would appreciate your help locating other trust worthy individuals to help guard my patient." 

"I think that's a great idea Dr. Quinzel. In the mean time I have a friend down at the police station that would be willing to take over one of the shifts guarding the Joker. Police commissioner Gordon." Harleen flinched, while she didn't think the commissioner would truly do anything she still felt very uncomfortable leaving the Joker with someone that had previously allowed a vigilante to beat on the Joker. She held silent for now. She knew this battle was far from over and she was going to need someone like Bruce Wayne to continue being on her side. 

After everyone started filling out she approached Mr. Wayne. "I want to see him." 

"I figured you might. I already got approval and when you are done Frost has permission to drive you back home with pay. I would ask that Frost starts his detail tonight. By tomorrow we should have the schedule reworked out. I'd like Frost to be there, even crispy I don't trust the Joker not to be up to something." 

Harleen nodded, " Can I make two requests?" Another one of those patented Wayne head tilts. " One, can Frost and I be on the same shift? I... I'm having some personal problems and I'm staying with Frost for the time being until its safe for me to go back home." His eyes narrowed at that but he nodded. 

"And the second?" 

"Can you remind the commissioner that his friend in the belfry is not welcome at Arkham or around the Joker. I'm not saving him from a group of vigilante orderlies just for the batman to beat the shit out of him." Another nod but this one was even stiffer and she thought she heard a snort from Mr. Wayne's butler whose expression turned cold at the statement. Obviously a batman fan, which was no longer very popular. She had a feeling she had just made herself a fixture in the butler's bad book. 

\-----------------  
Her and Frost hurried down to the infirmary. The nurse staff grateful that they were able to get away from the joker now that Dr. Quinzel and security were there to watch over him. 

The Joker was surprisingly awake when they walked in though his eyes were a little droopy. He was obviously on pain killers and the fact that he had consented to them (which was the first thing Harleen asked) told her how much pain he was in. He always made it a point to let her know how much he hated being medicated. The skin of his face was red and the skin extremely tight around his Glasgow smile. His hair was loose and floopy around his face and she only now noticed the brownish blonde hair coming in at the roots. Figuring that Frost wouldn't judge her too much she sat on the side of the Joker's bed and reached out a hand. Waiting for permission to touch him. He nodded and she gently brushed the hair out of his face that the nurses had just left there. Since his hands were still strapped down he hadn't been able to make his hair more comfortable himself. 

"It's been awhile but I think I can still remember how to do an impressive man bun if you would like?" He gave a weak chuckle but shook his head. 

"I'd rather, ah, have died of my injuries then risk the batman seeing a picture of me in a man bun." 

"The orderlies responsible have been placed on suspension. They are claiming you didn't tell them that the water was too hot and that they thought they were rewarding you for good behavior by giving you extra shower time. I'm so very sorry that this has happened to you again. I'm supposed to be responsible for protecting you and I failed." Her body shielding his movement from Frost he gently brushed his fingers against her hand that she had placed by his when she had finished smoothing his hair back. "I got them to agree to extra security for you. People that I mostly trust to not turn a blind eye. This is Frost, he's going to be taking the first shift. Then another of the guards named Gilligan. He's pretty funny but the Disney variety kind not the blowing things up kind. Then Mr. Wayne is going to have commissioner Gordon taking a shift as well for the time being. He would be the mostly part. I did let Mr.Wayne know that commissioner Gordon's bat friend is not welcome near you. I read about that little stunt they pulled in the police station. Oh, I brought you something. Though considering your reaction to the man bun I'm not sure you are going to want it."

"hmm, what'd yah get me." She looked back up and smiled at him gently again before going back to digging through her purse. Some how the cat had managed to fall way down deep in the purse." For the second time in as many days she missed the look that passed between Frost and Joker. Joker giving a nod indicating that his second in command had done a good job getting himself on the protection detail and Frost nodding toward Dr. Quinzel letting Joker know that he was looking after the doctor and the crisis that the Joker was worried about had been averted. 

"Here you go, this was mine when I was little. I figured with everything you were going through you could use a little comfort." He sighed but accepted the cat. He should have just let her give him the damn man bun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Scene was borrowed from orange is the new black when that one really abusive guard kills his boyfriends killer by leaving him in the hot shower.


	9. Daddy dearest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time passes, the manipulation of Harleen continues, Frost and Joker talk, and Joker makes a choice that has life changing consequences on everyone involved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter also brought to you by the letters F and U. If this laptop doesn't stop deleting my chapters I'm going to throw it against the wall. 
> 
> -  
> Mentions of rape, suicide, and semi-graphic instructions on how a murder should be committed. Also Joker's problematic view of domestic violence is not shared by the author. This being said this does not mean that domestic violence occurs between Harley and Joker.

The Joker was in the infirmary for a month. Harleen was still allowed sessions with him while he was in there provided she keep her recorder on. Since the infirmary was more dangerous the Joker had agreed to allow Frost to supervise the sessions but had firmly denied consent to have the orderlies listen to the sessions. Stating he would rather go without therapy if his abusers were allowed in the room during such a vulnerable time. Since he was allowing Frost to be present Harleen managed to convince the director that sessions should be allowed to resume. 

Harleen had backed off slightly from her behavior the night he was admitted. They had definitely made progress and had a good working relationship she did not dare to sit on the bed again and no more touches were exchanged. 

Her friendship with Frost had especially taken off. The two becoming fast and close friends. He was being extremely patient about her lack of progress on the situation with her father and she was starting to wonder if he would be willing to move to a two bedroom apartment with her. It would solve the issue of her father and she wouldn't have to lose her new found closeness with Frost while giving him back a good portion of his privacy. There had been an incident with them sharing the bed. Frost had accidentally rolled over and mistaking her for his friend Joe had slung his arm over her stomach. Not pulling her closer but maintaining contact. He had woken to Harleen with glassed over eyes and hyperventilating. He made her tea when he was able to snap her mostly out of it. Still crying, she explained what had been done to her as a kid, the fact that everyone in the house had known, her mother doing nothing and her brother so driven by guilt had eventually committed suicide. Frost had listened patiently, taking his queues from Harleen he just let her talk and kept his emotions out of it. When she was done, he packed them a bag, loaded her in his car, and took her to his gym. They took turns beating up a punching bag. The next day she had gotten a slightly knowing look from the Joker at the scuff marks on her knuckles but he made no comment on them. 

Frost had also told her a lot about himself. He told her about his life with his wife. How he had met Jo and the friendship that had formed from their shared views of the world. They had met at a protest against police corruption. When most of the protesters were arrested Jo had helped him escape getting rounded up. The protest, he explained had gotten violent when the police had shown up in riot gear trying to suppress the crowd. The police brutalizing protesters regardless if they were peacefully engaging in civil disobedience or were fighting back. 

"I know its not a popular opinion, but sometimes peaceful protests just don't work. They are not inconvenient enough to get people to stop and pay attention. Those that are in power, peaceful protests are easy to cover up and make sure the change doesn't happen. And the people in the middle the ones that are only marginally effected keep drinking the freaking kool-aid that everything is okay or as long as they keep their head down they don't have to get involved. 

Harleen hated how much that argument made sense. How many times had she viewed protests and went out of her way to avoid getting involved. Easily forgotten about as soon as the minor inconvenience to her day was resolved. She didn't mention this to Frost, but his story had opened her eyes a little to the point the Joker had been trying to make. That Gothom was screwed up and something drastic was needed to even the playing field. She still didn't approve of his actions they were wrong. But she kept remembering this old movie she used to like where the terrorist explained the difference between simply blowing up a building and the necessary destruction of a symbol. To make things change. 

\--------------------------  
Their last session in the infirmary took place on a Friday. The Joker was in high spirits, as much as it had been nice to be out of that cell being strapped to the bed most of the day was uncomfortable and he was pretty sure he was starting to get bed sores especially on his ass. Something he complained to Harleen about every chance he got. At one point even joking that Nurse Ratchet was spanking him for misbehaving during his sponge bath. 

"I heard about that." 

"oh, I knew that nurse Ratchet was, ah, horrible gossip. Honestly a man can't get any privacy about what he get's up to in the, ah, privacy of his hospital bed." She giggled. 

"Her name isn't Nurse Ratchet, and yes when a patient makes the new nurse quit its something they report to the patient's therapist. Did you really spend the entire bath quacking at her like a duck?" 

He smirked, "I did them a favor. If, ah, she can't handle quacking, shes going to be useless in a lock down situation." She wasn't really able to argue with that logic. 

"Seriously though, everyone's treating you okay? You haven't been hurt again?"

He sighed, "I'm fine. Stop Hen-pecking and get to the therapy. I'm, ah, a crazy man you know. I need all the therapy I can get." She rolled her eyes at him. 

"We've been meeting for a little over a month now. Are you willing to talk to me about the ferry incident?" He shrugged poking out at his scars he gave her a look she wasn't sure she was reading correctly. Almost like he was trying to figure out if She was ready to have this conversation. 

"What was the point of the whole thing? Why have them try to blow each other up?"

"If the citizens had blown up the criminals it would have proved the point that anyone can be pushed to anything, even mass murder, ah, during extreme circumstances. That no matter how much we pretend, ah, how we let the morals of those in power dictate our actions, that acting in our self interest even if that means the life of another is not inherently immoral." 

"And if it had happened the other way? What would that have proven?"

He prodded his scars again. "HMM, I ah, want to see if you can figure this one out for yourself." 

"Well, you always seem to think there's some kind of lesson the city should be learning from the attacks you pull. The citizens blowing up the criminals is a pretty intense lesson. Something you would hold dear to you, it serves your overall purpose of proving that chaos is the only true equalizer that systems of order create too many moral dilemmas that cause a few to hold power and the masses to struggle." He nodded to let her know she was on the right track. "So the lesson for the city, if the criminals had acted first, would have needed to be just as big, otherwise you wouldn't have risked it going either way. But what lesson would be as important to you as your chaos theory? Unless it was the same lesson no matter which boat acted first. But how would a boat of criminals blowing up a group of citizens be the same as the reverse." She looked at him and something caught her eye. The handcuffs... "the prisoners would have been hand cuffed. They would have had limited ability to find and control the explosive. Meaning that the guards on that ferry would have been the ones that hit the switch to kill the other citizens. And the prisoners would have taken the blame." He nodded and she paled at the implications. 

Frost though he wasn't supposed to spoke up, "If the citizens had done it, it would have been called self-defense. If the guards had done it and the prisoners had gotten the blame each one of them would have received an increased sentence. The same action having different consequences and morals assigned to it" They all went quiet and the session ended. 

\--------------------  
Harleen was hoping that Frost wasn't busy and they could spend the weekend together. After that intense session all she wanted to do was relax. While Frost usually stayed home with her every once in awhile he would go out with 'the boys'. He apologized for excluding her saying that they went to a shooting range and after that usually wound up at a strip club. He would go for the shooting and stay as the designated driver. Not trusting the guys to get a cab and no way in hell was her taking her to a strip club. She jokingly told him that she might enjoy it, and he shook his head. 

"You might, but no matter what you wear, with your looks someone's going to assume you're one of the dancers and get handsy." She hadn't brought it up again allowing him to enjoy his guy time guilt free. 

Waking up on Saturday, she was disappointed to find a note from Frost on the fridge. 

'Gilligan had to call off, he's got the flu and I'm picking up his shift. Do NOT burn down my kitchen ;p there are frozen waffles in the freezer.' She shrugged off her disappointment and made the waffles. Going into the living room she put on a Disney movie. She had been brushing up since the Joker seemed insistent on keeping the joke running randomly throwing in a quote or situation from one of the films. 

\---------------------  
Frost was escorting the Joker down the hall. He had been released from the infirmary that morning and had received approval to take an actual shower. Frost would be the one supervising much like the therapy sessions the orderlies were now to wait in the hall. There if needed but allowing the joker to have his privacy and as Harleen had argued on his behalf the ability to feel safe. Turning the shower on the Joker got right down to business to give him and Frost time to talk. Unfortunately for Frost this meant getting an eye full of his boss and friend. As the spoke while the Joker washed.

"We need to move up the time table for the escape. I've been here three months and they have already tried killing me twice. And kept me sedated for two months. Not too soon, we need for security to relax a little bit more but not the 7 months I was originally planning. I say we evaluate where security is at a month from now. Will that give you enough time to be ready?" 

"Yes, though it would help if we had more inside help. I'm pretty sure Gilligan won't be a problem, He won't even realize he's helping. Without Dr. Quinzel's help though I'm not sure security is going to be relaxed enough in a month."

"Ah, yes, and how are things with our pretty little doctor? How did you manage to get her to calm the fuck down? I thought she was going to faint in that session the day before I was attacked." 

Frost coughed, "She's been staying at my place." Joker stood back up from washing his legs and raised an eyebrow. 

"You cheating on me, Frosty?" The Joker asked with a grin. 

Frost shrugged "well I did let her use that abomination of a batman onsie of yours until we could get her a change of clothes. But she and I haven't snuggled if that's what you're getting at." Joker glared about his batman onsie but then sighed. He guessed if it had to be anyone using the onsie at least it was her. He wouldn't have to worry about her stretching it out or making it gross. 

"It must have been something fucking big for you to let her stay with you." 

Frost nodded, "I did as you asked and drove her home so I could keep an eye on her. When we got there she had a panic attack. Someone was waiting there, stalking out her apartment." Frost paused, wondering how much he could get away with keeping out. He really did like Harleen and he wanted to protect her as much as possible without betraying the joker. 

"I know she's a rape victim, Frost, I'm a genius remember and it wasn't hard to put her obvious PTSD together with the fact that she dresses like a nun about to go to Christ. And I figured out in that session that it had to be more then a one time thing and that most likely her abuser was coming around. So tell me, what kind of man does Harleen Quinzel date. And I don't mean the obvious abusive qualities. Did you see what he looked like?" 

Frost went a little green around the gills, "J..." Joker was taking in his reaction not liking what he saw. "It was her dad, man, her dad started raping her when she was 10 and didn't stop until the day she escape at 17 to go to college. What's worse her mom knew and helped him hide the evidence. Then her little brother killed himself with the guilt" Joker clenched his fists. Domestic violence wasn't really his thing, who wanted a partner that they had to worry was going to screw them over to get away from the abuse? But he wished that had been the case this time. He didn't like thinking about the doc even smaller then she was now crying as she was violated. Not choosing to go back to the abuse from fear, or shame, or even some misguided notion that she could save the guy. But because she truly had no choice, she had no proof and without that she would not have been removed from the home. 

"I don't care who does it, I don't care how much it costs. They both die this weekend." Frost's frown morphed into a grin. That was one assignment he had no trouble getting behind. If he could risk it he would personally take care of it. 

"Any special requests?" 

"Have them cut off his dick and shove it up his ass. While he's still alive. I want his hands, eyes, and ears cut off/out as well. Same for her mother."

"The dick part I get but the eyes, hands and ears?" 

"He saw and touched what didn't belong to him, and ignored her cries. Her mother refused to see the abuse, used those hands to cover it up, and closed her ears to the suffering of her child." Frost nodded. "Also I want to leave a rose on her desk with a note. 'Come see me, I hope you liked your gift."

"I'll get it taken care of." The joker turned off the water and got dressed with Frost re-cuffing him for the Journey back to his room. 

\---------  
Frost made the call after his shift ended from a payphone down the street from the Asylum and by 2 o'clock the next day it was all over the news that the Joker's therapist's parents had been found tortured and killed. Due to Harleen staying with Frost and not at her apartment the news broke faster then the police were able to track her down to inform her. Frost making sure that Harleen and himself had alibis for the time of the crime not that Harleen knew that. He had braced himself to take care of Harleen but she hadn't needed it. When she saw the news she shed a single tear and whispered "its finally over". She wore a huge smile for the rest of the weekend.   
\--------------  
Monday had presented a whole slew of problems that in her relief she hadn't thought about. Most of her co-workers gave her strange looks that she would show up to work after the weekend she had. She was pulled into the director's office before she even had a chance to visit her own and told her sessions were all canceled for the day. It was highly recommended that she go home. The director had even brought in Bruce Wayne to attempt to make her see reason. 

"Harleen, truly no one will think less of you for taking some time off. I promise we won't reassign the Joker on you and surely you trust Frost to make sure he is taken care of in your absence?"

"Of course I trust Frost! I just really don't need the time off. I "she looked down "I really wasn't close to my parents. My brother committed suicide when I was about 22 and our family drifted apart after it. We never reconnected. I mourned the loss of my parents a long time ago, I promise." They still looked a little unsure but accepted the excuse gracefully. She decided to compromise, "How about I do a partial day. I really insist on still seeing the Joker, he is making such good progress and I don't want my personal problems to upset that." They looked uneasy about her doing her session with the joker but since he hadn't caused trouble lately they decided to allow it. Dr. Quinzel had proven after all that she was quite capable of handling the Joker and his moods. 

Heading to her office she hung up her jacket. It was finally getting to the point where she could put it away soon as the first hints of summer could be felt and dropped her bag to the floor by her desk. On the desk was a single red rose causing her to smile and pick up the card thinking it was probably from Bruce. It seemed like the kind of gesture he would make. She walked around to sit on her chair as she pulled out the card. Falling heavily into the chair as she actually read the contents. Hope you liked your gift... hope you liked your gift... come see me... hope you liked your gift... it was signed Mr. J. 

\------------------  
Harleen paced the therapy room. The recorder she didn't bring with her deciding that she definitely didn't want this conversation on tape and that she could blame it on the situation anyway. Did the card mean what she thought it meant? Had the Joker really killed her parents? If so, was it done to be cruel? No, that didn't make any sense. They were getting along quite well. He had mentioned before that he had a little bit of her personal history worked out something she had always been uncomfortable with but could he have truly had it worked out to this extent? The police and the news were holding back the details of her parents torture stating they were hoping to use it to find the killer. Had there been a clue left behind that she didn't receive as the police searched for the killer? Did it matter? How often had she dreamed of the news that her parents were dead? How if someone had been responsible she would have found a way to thank them? After all when Frost had offered to break his legs it had been her concern for Frost not her father that had her hold him back. Her eyes turned vibrant made more visible by the fact that she had completely forgotten to grab her glasses and the widest grin on her face.   
\------------------  
Joker thought he was prepared for any reaction. He knew it was a risk giving her a hint that he had arranged for their deaths. He practically swaggered into the room, ready for her crying, or a confused inquiring face. What he saw instead had him stumble in his tracks and his breath catch in his throat. She was gorgeous. She was wearing that dress again. The one she had pulled on in a rush to see him in the infirmary. The green making her eyes that more of a vibrant blue. The halter top clinging giving her a shape for once even if the dress hem went down to her ankles. Her eyes not blocked by those stupid glasses. And that smile, for the first time he was seeing her give a genuine smile with nothing held back. His heart skipped a beat and he realized how screwed he was and how badly he needed to fix this, to make her stop looking at him like that. 

Getting chained in the orderlies left the room with Gilligan going behind them making up for his missed shift by covering Frost's. 

He looked up at her still with that smile on her face and he sneered. She stumbled back in shock her smile disappearing. 

"I... I got your note. The flower was beautiful. Was that... was that the present you were talking about?" There nice and innocent don't play all your cards. 

"Why the hell would I go to all that trouble to give you a stupid flower as a gift. You've shown at least a little intelligence in these meetings, don't start playing the stupid blonde now. We both know what your present was." 

"Why though? You mentioned you knew a little about my past but enough to decide it would be a gift to have them dead? How is that possible?" 

"You can thank you new bff for that. So eager to share how pathetic you are, how sick he is of you being at his place. How he can't even sleep properly in his own fucking bed because of the poor sad rape victim that goes to pieces over something as small as an arm innocently placed around her. Don't worry, I left a rose for him too letting him know about my gift. I figured it was really a gift for both of you and then I would never have to listen to your sniveling or his whining again. Tell me, was daddy proud of the little monster he made? So disgustingly pitiful that her own brother had to off himself to get away from you." He saw a split second too late that he had taken it way too far, he was expecting a stinging slap across his face but instead her eyes reached a new level of glass he had never seen before. He imagined it was the same level it reached when the rapes had occurred. With a detachment he would not have believed if he had not seen it, she walked to the door and sent Gilligan on an errand, then turning to the orderlies she advised them to take him downstairs and get him ready for electroshock therapy. He started to struggle. "Dr. Quinzel, I was, ah, out of line. You don't want to do this." 

The orderlies got him unchained and started to pull him out the door. "I'll be right behind you on the next elevator down." Harleen stood there numb. She heard the joker yelling down the hall. It wasn't until the screams cut off that she realized what she had just done. She leaned over and vomited. It took her several minutes to be able to compose herself. Suddenly the door flew up and Gilligan ran instead. 

"Doc, Doc. What happened I went on that errand and then I heard that the orderlies were instructed to prep Joker for electroshock? Dr. Barty is getting ready to start it."

Harleen paled further. "I told them I would be down to do it?"

"He said that he didn't want you doin' something like that, not after your parents were just tortured and killed. Said to let you know he'd take care of it for you."

She ran out of the room and down the stairs. She had to stop them. Let them know she made a mistake that she was too emotional to be at work. Anything to get them not to go through with the insanity that she had started. By the time she hit the last set of stairs she could hear that she was too late. Her legs collasped under her midway down the stairs. 'He was never going to forgive her for this and he shouldn't either'. 

\-------------  
The Joker was walked passed her on the way back to his cell. She could see the hurt in his eyes and the hardening of them against her. She could see how much pain he was in even with the muscle relaxers and other safe guards. When she could finally walk again she called Frost to pick her up. She couldn't bring herself to tell him what had happened until they arrived back at his place. He had told her to pack her things. That she would be going back to her own apartment. He didn't want her there anymore. He did let her know that the Joker had the right to choose what happened and if he decided to file a complaint against her, he let her know that he would back up the Joker. Frost's friendship with Harleen was over.


	10. How can I ever say sorry enough

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> My muse took over this one guys. I don't even know what to put here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: coerced consent, sexual haressment, inability to give knowledgeable consent. Murder. Scene is marked by * so it can be skipped if needed. 
> 
> Also from here on out we start getting into suicide squad plotlines so don't be surprised if some of the scenes start to look familiar.

Joker woke with Frost crouched next to his bed with an ice pack and the smell of vomit heavily in the air. 

"Thank God you're alright." 

"Hmm you don't have to thank me, Frosty, we both know I've endured worse." Frost made a noncommittal noise in the back of his throat. 

"J, I just don't understand, what the hell happened? I trusted that bitch, I... I helped her, feed her, literally at times it felt like I was holding her sanity in my hands. Do you know what sent her over the deep end like that?" 

"I walked into that room and she... Frost, she was giving me this smile that could have lit up the whole fucking universe. Not because I was making progress or being a good little boy but because I murdered someone for her. Like for once someone in this world finally got the complete joke. Not just the set up but the punchline too. It was too much. That's not why I'm here, that's not part of the fucking joke and I needed it to stop. By the time I was done, she wasn't smiling anymore it was like she was a whole different person. I broke her down to show her true self and it was just as boring as everyone else. Poor little abused child becoming the abuser. Just cruelty without a point, without a punchline. And then she had the nerve to show her fucking face as they were escorting me back to my cell and looking like she had the right to be pitiful, like she shouldn't have to face the consequences because she was sorry."

"Speaking of, I was waiting to talk to you about that. You want to file a complaint? You know I'll back you up and I talked the Gilligan and he will too. He said that it was clear that the doctor wasn't in her right mind. Said the orderlies and Dr. Bartholomew were way out of line to go along with it. I also kicked her out of the house, she's back at her place."

"No, she owes me big time and she'll owe me even more once I don't come forward. Let her keep her fucking job and her fucking life. I'm going to use her to get the hell out of this place. And then I'm going to get even."  
\---------  
Harleen took the rest of the week off. She called letting them know that it was finally hitting her and she felt like taking bereavement leave was the best option. She didn't tell them that she was mourning the loss of her friendship with Frost and the loss of her trust with Joker. 

Harleen had always known that something wasn't quite right with her. That years of abuse had put up walls around certain aspects of her personality. That was the reason her eyes looked like glass when she was scared. It was her defense system for the girl, and later the women that she should have been instead of the terrified person she had become. So that maybe one day when it was all over that person was still there undamaged and could join the rest of her. Glass for Harleen, fierce ice for the powerful woman she should have become, and vibrant steel blue when the two came together and Harleen was at peace and complete. It wasn't quite a split personality disorder but it also wasn't mentally healthy either. She spent the week unpacking from her extended stay with Frost. Her eyes shifting from glass to ice like a winter storm.   
\-------------------  
When Harleen got into work on the following Monday she broke down in tears in her office. There on her desk was the cat that she had given to the Joker. The message clear, he didn't want her comfort anymore. Her eyes that had still been shifting at that point settling back down into glass the fight going out of the fierce ice. She trembled until it was time for her session with the Joker. Waiting for someone to come down to inform her that she was suspended or fired for torturing a patient. The patient she had insisted they treat like a human being. Sitting down in the session room she was surprised when Gilligan and Frost both came in with the Joker. Not chaining him up they allowed him to get comfortable in front of her and he double checked that the recorder was not yet on. 

"I think we need to set some ground rules going forward Dr. Quinzel." She nodded her head letting him know he had her complete attention. "One, Frost or Gilligan will be in here during our sessions for the time being. They can stand guard outside in the future, if I start trusting you again. They are here to make sure my consent is given for my treatment. Electroshock is completely off the table. You will never do that again."

A tear worked itself down her face " I promise..." He cut her off. 

"Good, and stop crying. You don't get to be the victim anymore. Two, I want more privileges and reduced security. The orderlies allowed YOU to torture me this time and I don't want them near me. Frost and Gilligan are both competent to escort me to and fro during the day and at night in my cell I don't need someone watching me while I shit, jack off and sleep. I've been a model patient for three months and have been abused repeatedly in this place. If I was any other criminal I would have been released by now for cruel and unusual punishment." 

She brushed off her tears, "I'll work with the director on getting you privileges. Frost and Gilligan will still need to be with you at all times you are outside of your cell but I'm sure I can arrange for some rec time or for walks in the garden if you would prefer?" 

"Gardens, I want fresh air and I"m assuming that the only thing in the rec room is a tv and some tables to sit around and talk or play a board game that's had so many of its pieces swallowed that's its pointless trying to play." She nodded. 

"Then its settled, for the time being I'm not going to file a complaint. I..." He paused and sighed, "Not giving you any excuses what you did was..." He trailed off not saying what he was thinking, "But an argument could be made that I started it. So for now I'm going to let it slide as long as you do these things for me." 

Harleen gave a sigh of relief "Of course! I'll be happy to do it. I honestly should have already gotten you privileges. And I completely understand you wanting Gilligan or Frost in here. I violated your trust and you are absolutely right you making the first comments does not justify me having someone get physical with you. I will never be able to tell you how sorry I am." 

He shrugged off her apology, "I'm not ready to forgive you" mentally screaming in rage at her, she tortured him and had the nerve to come back here and be relieved he wasn't going to tattle on her? Like he should eventually forgive and forget because he made some nasty comments first? "But I may get there eventually." She gave him a blinding smile and like when he had first met her all he could think was Bingo. He had her. 

After that the recorder was turned on and the session continued as normal. Both showing their acting skills to make it seem like no progress, no trust had been lost.   
\-------------------  
She had taken to sleeping with the little stuffed cat. Something she hadn't done since college. As much as he had protested it was obvious that he had kept the cat at least near him if not sleeping with it. It smelled like him, a musky tone of sandlewood and gunpowder that couldn't be overpowered by the normal scents of the asylum. After a couple of days the smells disappeared and the cat started to smell of her apartment again. As if the old scents had risen the the surface even after the month in what was supposed to be its new home. 

Joker had requested at the end of their last sessions to take the meetings down to twice a week. He wanted her more desperate for their time together and it was less time he would have to control himself in front of her. Pretending that he was working his way towards forgiving her. He did give her permission to check in on Wednesday's to see if he needed all three sessions but he did not plan on taking her up on it. He did take the opportunity to remind her of the promised changes. 

"I put in a request to met with the director but he is out for the week. I'll be meeting with the assistant director today instead." He nodded and waved her off. She attempted to catch Frost eyes but he wouldn't look at her. 

Harleen had never liked her supervisor. He was one of the few guilty doctors to survive the purge that happened after Dr. Crane. It had cost him the promotion to director but not his job. He was also one of the few men that seemed to notice her no matter what she did, but unlike Gilligan, with him it was creepy. And there had been rumors for years that he had slept with most of the nursing staff. 

She knocked on the door to his office and walked in when she was told to do so. The office was set out like a stereotypical therapy room instead of an office. He had the one arm chair and a therapy coach which had never made sense to Harleen since he didn't see patients in here. He directed her to sit on the coach and pulled his office chair over to sit across from her. 

"Now what can I do for you Ms. Quinzel?" Her eyes flashed to ice. She was a doctor not a Ms. But squished it down. Correcting him was not going to get her what she needed. 

"I want to discuss getting the Joker some privileges. His been a model patient for 3 almost 4 months..." He interrupted her. 

"And was sedated for two of those." She had expected that argument. 

"Which still leaves him with almost two consecutive months of what I would consider above and beyond good behavior since he didn't retaliate against the orderlies that attacked him." Or me, she thought mentally. "Normally we start giving patients back their privileges after 2 weeks of good behavior, 1 month if the transgression was severe. We are still treating the Joker more harshly then we do other patients."

"Harleen, I understand, you have a big heart. Its touching how much you care for your patients." He moved over to sit beside her on the coach. "However, this is the Joker we are talking about. Do you know what it would do to my career, my reputation, if I'm the one that puts the stamp of approval on those privileges and he escapes?" He put his hand on her thigh rubbing up and down "surely you don't want to put me in that position. Not when there are so many better positions we can be in." She puts her hand on his to push it off only to have her hand trapped between his hands. "Then again maybe we could work something out. I could put in a good word with the director when he get's back." 

*****************

Harleen's eyes are glass, can she even say no? She owes the Joker those privileges after what she did. That won't happen if she says no. She removes her hand. "Good girl, just let it happen." He slides his hand up to caress the crouch of her slacks and gently rubs there for a few moments tilting Harleen's face to his for a kiss. At first she only remembers fragments, being pulled down to lie across the coach. A hand on her breast and another on the button of her slacks and pulling down the zipper. A hand slipping into her underwear and finding her dry. Fingers at her lips to correct that problem. A rubbing motion and an unwanted orgasm. Fierce ice eyes finally breaking apart the rest of the way and taking control. From there everything is remembered in complete clarity. A dick tracing her lips, pre-cum and sweat being tasted by the first of the taste buds on her tongue. A command to open her mouth and the dick sliding in. Grabbing his hips and pulling him in deeper and then biting down. Screaming turns into whimpers as he goes into shock. A paperweight from the desk is picked up. One, two, three. Its done and he is not moving again. 

**********  
Due to the time of day most of the doctors were in their sessions and with big egos also came big isolated offices. No one noticed her slipping out and putting the 'do not disturb' sign on the door. Harleen hadn't worn her lab coat into the meeting something her fierce eyed counter part took advantage of. Buttoning the coat up to hide the blood on her clothes. It would do in a pinch. There were no cameras on that floor but that didn't make her off the hook. She was going to need to see Mr. J. He would know what she needed to do. 

She made her way down to the basement receiving odd looks for the second trip but Frost followed her in anyway. The door being shut for privacy. Joker immediately seeing that something was up. Her eyes were that almost gray color that usually meant she was pissed. 

"What's this about Harleen?" Frost asked grumpily. He wasn't happy to see her for the second time that day. 

She shook her head, "I"m not Harleen." She got two double takes at that proclamation. "Harleen was just sexually assaulted by her supervisor. She" little giggle "finally gave me the reigns to drive, startin' with killing that stupid motherfucker that put his hands on her. She finally had a bad enough day." She sighed, "I'm not really sure how to clean up the scene though. I can get you a food bribe to help me, how about some extra of the puddin' they had at lunch?" Joker was mesmerized, like everything he had been feeling for Harleen pre-shock treatment had transferred over. This was Harleen without the weaknesses, without the fear. 

"Frost, give us a minute alone, then I want you to help not-Harleen here to clean up that mess. Make sure the orderlies mind their business too." Frost nodded, still looking spooked by not-Harleen's declaration. As soon as he was out the door, Joker was up and pulling her hand to his mouth. "Joker, nice to meet you. Do you have a name?" 

"No, Harleen refused to name me. Said I wasn't a separate personality yet so I wasn't allowed to have my own name. In her mind I was just the parts of her she kept hidden from her father and then later from everyone else. Her rage, confidence, lust, all the bits of her she was supposed to be but couldn't risk being." Neither of them noticed that they were still holding hands and drifting closer together. Joker leaned forward first but allowed not Harleen to come the remaining 10%. The kiss quickly becoming heated when he tasted the blood on her lips, the joker opening her lab coat and picking her up to pin her against the wall after seeing her bloody clothes. He was rocking against her softly when he noticed that the moans had turned into scared whimpers. Looking up into glass eyes his suspicions confirmed, Harleen was back. 

He dropped her down to the ground and stepped back. "How much do you remember?" 

"Remember? Almost none of it, there are fragments of what was going on. Then I remember giving her control. She filled me in on the rest of what happened. Frost is going to help me cover it up?" 

"Yes" He turned his back to her sitting on the bed and using the pillow to cover his erection. 

"I'm sorry, I wish I could finish that for you." She said with a blush. Not Harleen was screaming to be let back out to do exactly that. 

"I wouldn't want it from you anyway." He gave her a hard look. It was clear that Harleen was not forgiven, no matter his clear desire for her alter ego. 

"She said she owes you pudding, I'll bring it by later." He shrugged his shoulders and turned over in the bed. He couldn't deal with Harleen right now.   
\-------------  
It hadn't taken her and Frost very long to clean up surprisingly. He explained that since it was on the records that she had a meeting it would look suspicious to completely remove her prints from the room. Opting instead to clean up the murder weapon and her prints on the do not disturb sign. It was pointless to try cleaning up the blood since they weren't going to cover up the fact he was murdered. While they were cleaning they talked. 

"So how long have you been working for Mr. J?" 

"The entire time you've known me." 

"He's your friend Jo, isn't he?" 

"Yes." 

"So the batman onsie?"

"I don't get it either." They shared a laugh before he sobered up. "I really meant everything I said about him though. Everyone sees him as this horrible terrorist. But he has his reasons. He's got a point that it would take a cataclysmic event to finally fix things in Gothom. But that's also why I can't forgive you. You may have been my friend but he's my best friend and you tortured him. You realize that right? 

"Yes, I wish so badly that I could take it back. I don't know if I was honestly ever going to really go through with it. As soon as I couldn't hear his screams anymore it was like I woke up. I threw up and then Gilligan was running into the room to tell me that Dr. Bartholomew was about to get started on the shock treatment for me. I ran as fast as I could to stop it. To let them know I was being emotional, to not let me abuse my patient like that. I could hear that I was too late and my legs just turned to putty."

"Do you think it could have been not-Harleen? You mentioned it was almost like waking up?"

"As much as I wish I could say yes, it wasn't her. At that point we were still not quite disconnected though it was close. It was like I had completely closed the connection to her trapping her in a bubble. She wasn't there at all and all that was left was this terrified child. I..." She brushed the tear off her check. "I think not-Harleen was supposed to be the dominate personality. I think I'm the shield that she created to keep her safe and then I became so scared I refused to give back control. I don't think I'm real. All those fun times we had my eyes were always that vibrant blue almost grey color right?" He looked freaked but nodded, "I don't think she realizes that she's the real us. Before we split today, I was the act that she put up but I couldn't take it anymore, I couldn't take what was happening to us yet again and I finally split us apart no more masks or shields but two different people in one body instead." 

They walked down the hall to her office, Frost had found a female patient willing to take ownership of the crime for a bribe. He hadn't told the patient which staff member it was. Only that one of the female staff members had been assaulted by the assistant director and killed him on accident. After making sure she got back to her office unseen he was going to go down to the patient and bring her up to the office to put her prints on things and do a little staging of the crime scene as well. Frost would walk in and 'discover' the assistant director with his pants down and dick detached unable to stop the patient before she had hit the director for the third time. At worse the patient would have some privileges temporarily revoked but that was unlikely. There were no additional prints on the pants button. It would look like the assistant director had attempted to assault a patient and the patient had fought back and won. 

\------------------------  
Frost had told the Joker about his conversation with Harleen. He hadn't seemed very surprised but even more intrigued to get to know Not-Harleen. They needed to find a name for her soon. As predicted the event with the assistant director blew over quickly. No one really mourning him and several of the female staff coming forward to defend the patient stating that they were harassed or in some situations coerced into sex with him. Cameras were added to the third floor offices and Wayne enterprises insisted on sexual harassment training for all staff members. The patient was given additional sessions, and had no privileges taken away not to mention the tidy sum added to her bank account for when she was deemed cured and could be released. 

Harleen meet with the director as soon as he was back and was able to gain more freedom for the joker. Using the situation to her advantage to press the point that Mr. Wayne was sure to be keeping an even closer eye on patient abuse as the asylum was bringing him all sorts of negative publicity. 

Harleen started to bring pudding to her sessions with the Joker. The inclusion of Not-Harleen made Harleen feel like the joker was forgiving her more and more. He even let Frost stay outside now stating that he knew that he could trust Not-Harleen to keep him safe. Harleen was starting to get worried about the missing time during their sessions. And eventually had to report that her recorder was broken asking if she could write her notes instead. Thankfully she was given permission. 

It was after one of these sessions later that night in her bed that Harleen begged to know what they were talking about. 

'I'm trying to get him to forgive you.'

' Is it working?' 

'yes' 

' why are our lips always so sore' 

'because he and I were kissing.'

'Is he a good kisser?'

'The best, it always is when you're in love'

'LOVE?! You've only known him for like a week?' 

'Dummy, I was you before we split, I've known him as long as you have. And even if that wasn't the case. Sweetheart you've been in love with that man since he took that dumb cat from you.'   
\---------------  
Harleen kept control for the majority of the next meeting. Ever since her talk about love with Not- Harleen she was desperate to. The Joker didn't let on how much it annoyed him. He and Not-Harleen couldn't even get a kiss in before Harleen snapped back control. Giving him the toy cat again. He accepted it, he was ready for Harleen to think he had forgiven her. Not knowing that her attempts to control the body and stop Not-Harleen was spiraling the Joker even further in his desperation to not only get revenge but his desperation to get Not-Harleen out of Harleen's control. 

"I need you to do something for me." 

"Anything.. I mean yeah." 

"I need you to get me a machine gun."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I may go back and edit the last chapter. It felt really stiff and like it was jumping too quickly from scene to scene. I had to rewrite it once and I was working on it for over 6 hours yesterday and it still doesn't feel great. But I was also really excited to get it out since it was such a major plot point. Let me know what you guys think!?


	11. Payback

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harleen get's to hear Joker's story, escapes are planned, and revenge is had.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are getting to the end of part 1. I've decided to make things easier that instead of doing books I'm going to have everything here separated into different parts. I have another story idea that won't leave me alone so updates may be a little further apart as I go between the two stories. 
> 
> Torture warning. I hope you enjoy my nod to the movie Joker.

"A machine gun?" He smiles at her. "I don't understand, why me? Shouldn't that be something that Frost is in charge of?" His smile disappears into a look of disappointment. 

"Security check one another when they come into the building. However if you brought it in, Frost would be able to do the check on you and say you were clear. Please Harleen, I need you to do this for me. I've been hurt too many times in here, I need to get out. I want to forgive you, I really do but I need you to help me get out. Show me that you really are sorry by helping me get to safety." 

His eyes turned so pleading and she couldn't resist leaning over and kissing him. She felt him hesitate at first and then pull away completely. "I feel like I'm cheating on her." Harleen didn't need to ask who he meant. She closed her eyes and didn't see his smirk. When her eyes open back up they were vibrant blue steel. " I don't want to lose you, I understand that you choose her but we both love you. Let both of us love you. I can put her and me back together again and then you can have us both." She looked so proud of herself and the Joker had to turn away to hide his expression. The first time Not-Harleen told him that she loved him should not be tainted by Harleen. He didn't want them together, he wanted Harleen the traitor gone. She gently turned his face back to hers and with a questioning look asked for permission to kiss him. He choose to focus on the bits of not-Harleen he could see and allow the kiss. It would keep Harleen happy and trusting enough to break him out. Not-Harleen would do so anyway but Harleen could still ruin the whole thing. He and Frost had been running plans and the only one that worked and allowed him enough time to get revenge meant that Harleen had to be involved. He pulled his head back and winked his eye at her and Harleen giggled. An arrogant roguish smile coming across his face. 

" I know we are going to get you out soon-ish but I'm starting to get requests for more information about the progress we are making in here. There's one subject we haven't really talked about. Will you tell me how you got those scars? The truth not the stories you tell." Maybe it was the fact that Not-Harleen was in there too or the fact that before her betrayal he had started to respect Harleen as a therapist but he decided to tell her the truth. Spiraling down into darkness and confusion as he told her his story. 

"My father was a cruel man, tended to favor the grape, or any swill he could get his hands on. He liked to beat on my mother and me for the littlest of reasons. Sometimes for no reason at all. One day he decided to take me to the circus and for the first time I saw my father truly laugh. Thought he would bust a gut with how hard he was laughing. That night we came home and tossed a baseball, he didn't touch one drop of that shit... tucked me in and everything. I was so happy I thought our lives had finally changed. I wanted to keep him laughing so when he came home from work the next day I greeted him in his sunday best and took a prat fall and destroyed his pants. " Harleen prayed to herself that the story wasn't going where she thought it was going. " Dad broke my nose, I was so busy trying to make him laugh I failed to notice that he had obviously stopped by the bar after work. He was already three sheets to the wind. He grabbed a knife from our kitchen and threw me in the car driving back to the circus. Told me if I wanted to be a clown so much that they could have me. But that he needed to make sure I would belong first. He carved up my checks and threw me from the car. One of the clowns found me and patched me up. He unofficially adopted me and three month we saw that my father had beaten my mother to death. When the cops realized that they had a kid that couldn't be found he was charged with my murder too. I decided then that the boy I was died in that fucking car and I took a stage name like my savior and refused to be called anything else. I've been Joker ever since." 

"And that phrase, why so serious? Was that the last thing your father ever said to you?" He smiled. 

"No, that's part of the joke. Whenever I would start to feel sorry for myself, Carnival, the clown that adopted me used to say that. He'd pull me close and make silly faces at me until I felt like I would die laughing. Like my whole world was finally being set right and undoing years of bad parenting." 

"What happened?" She whispered. It was obvious the story didn't have a happy ending. 

"Carnival had some mental heath issues from being abused himself. He had Pseudobulbar affect from a head injury. He and I were on the train and these high society drunks started to mess with this woman. I think he was afraid they would try to rape her in front of me. He got involved and it set off his PBA. They started kicking him and the gun he had on him slid my way. The woman ran when she saw the gun, didn't stop to help the man that had stepped in to help protect her. Just ran, so I picked up the gun and shot all three of them. Carnival took the blame, said that he was just trying to protect his kid from those drunks but with his health issues he wasn't supposed to have the gun in the first place. He was charged and convicted of their murders, he died in prison some of the inmates decided he was laughing at them and made sure he could never laugh again." By that time Harleen was in tears, her eyes still blue steel as both parts of her cried at his pain. 

"shush, come here." He opened his arms and she crawled into them. Sitting on his lap hoping that she was comforting him as much as he was her. She said nothing as his grip became tighter and tighter on her hips. Allowing Not-Harleen to bleed a little more through so she didn't accidentally panic. She could see the rage in his eyes. The helplessness he had felt, the confusion on why he was sharing this with her. "I need you to promise not to tell them that. Can't have it getting out that the joker actually has a heart after all." She nodded. 

" I promise". 

"I need not-Harleen, please?" Harleen shook her head. 

"Let us both comfort you." She tried to kiss him again but he shook her off. 

"Our times up doc."

\----------------------------  
Ever since the therapy meeting with the Joker her eyes had been steel blue. Harleen refusing to be buried but willing to share the wheel with her counter part. If she had been in therapy they may have even called it progress on the two personalities coming back together. Today she was going back to Frost's place so that they could work on a plan to help the Joker escape. It would be her first time back there since their fight. 

He let her into the apartment and handed her a cup of the tea he used to make for her. 

"So who am I talking to today?" 

"Technically both of us. I think I've managed to undo the split mostly. I just focused on the fact that we both love Joker and promised not to bury not-Harleen again if she would promise to do the same." 

" I still don't get it." He said shaking his head. 

"Its mental illness, its hard to explain and the explanations are sometimes going to be contradictions because even I'm not entirely sure when or how things happen. As much as psychologist try its never as easy as putting things into neat boxes. When I was little I use to make a shield to hide behind when I was being abused. I disassociated from the trauma so I could survive it. Later that shield became a mask to hide the fact that I was damaged anyway. It wasn't really a separate person, not a separate entity that had control over the body not until that day in the office. More like I would disassociate again just going through motions."

"I thought you said that not-Harleen was the real you and that she wasn't responsible for the torture of the Joker?"

"Honestly, my explanation that day was a little frazzled. I was still more or less in shock. I'm still not entirely sure how to explain everything. But I will say that the person that the Joker recognizes as Not-Harleen isn't to blame. She was disassociating she buried herself so deep under her shield that later became the split personality." 

"What's with the eye thing then if your personalities didn't split until the office?"

"Glass for when I disassociate, blue steel for when I was healthily dealing with my trauma not denying the abuse but still letting my real personality shine through, and fierce ice was a different version of the disassociation. One defensive the other offensive. I still have some work to do for the personalities to be back together completely but I'm working with myself. Right now Not-Harleen and Harleen are sharing control of the vehicle so to speak." 

He sighed, " I think I'm starting to get it. But you really should make sure the Joker get's all this. I've been his friend for a long time and he is starting to get very attached to Not-Harleen."

"He's coming around, trust me, he's starting to forgive me so when I do finally get our personalities back together the rest of the way he won't have to worry about Harleen vs not-Harleen. He can just love us as the one person. 

Frost didn't say anything more, he still didn't forgive her and he wasn't going to give away the Joker's plans. While he got what she was trying to say, that she wasn't really in control of herself when she ordered the electroshock that her shield had kicked in to protect her mental state, the Joker still blamed those aspects of her and for him it was going to be easier to blame a separate personality and get rid of it then to forgive Harleen for the betrayal. To the Joker he would consider it killing the traitor and then he could still walk into the sunset with Not- Harleen. He could already tell this would not end well. 

"So how am I getting the gun into the building?"

"The weather is warming up. More patients are going to want time outside and with that many out doors its better if they are doing an organized activity. You are going to generously go out and buy some sports equipment to donate to the Asylum. I recommend partnering with your old pal Bruce Wayne for the funds unless you want to actually be generous and buy the stuff yourself?" She shook her head. She may be a doctor but she was still paying off student loans. "Once that's done you'll hide the guns in the equipment which I will do the security check on. Once that's clear we get the guns out to the storage shed in the yard. Once Joker has his yard time I'll bring him into the shed with the excuse that he wants to shoot some basketball. Once there he and I will get the guns ready and storm the asylum. Gilligan will raise the alarm and then be there to let in the "Swat" team that is actually our guys. We get you and Joker out so find an excuse to be on the ground floor. I would recommend the bathroom on that floor, gives you a set location to hide in so its easy for us to find you."

Harleen agreed, the plan was set. Come that Friday the Joker would be free to reign Gothom once more. 

\------  
She was surprised how easy and quick it was to get a meeting with Bruce Wayne. He explained that his date for the evening had canceled on him last minute and that he would hate to cancel the reservation on a Saturday night. 

"So not that I'm complaining, but how did I manage to get a date with the lovely Dr. Quinzel this evening?"

She gave a little laugh "I'm sorry, I must admit that I do have ulterior motives. As the weather get's nicer we are going to have more and more patients that want yard time. I was hoping to see if Wayne enterprises is generous enough to donate money for sports equipment? As you know our budget is tight all extra funds go toward building repair or the money we have to throw at the security and most of the staff to keep them working at a place like Arkham. Patients keep claimer if we keep them engaged and with more and more of them in the yard at the same time."

"Better to have them focused on friendly compeition then trying to escape, or hurting themselves or others." He finished her thought. 

"Exactly, I know that sporting supplies aren't terrible expensive but with my student loans its still a little outside of my personal budget and no one else has been interested in pooling our resources to buy stuff for yard time." 

"how much?"

"1,000? I figured I could get a cheap portable basket ball hoop and some bat mitten supplies, a football or two, soccer balls, a valley ball, some basketballs. I'm sure I can talk the store into a discount as a charitable donation as well." 

"Well you have my vote!" He took out his pocket book and wrote her a blank check which she blinked at. "I don't want you coming out of pocket if it goes over. Just fill out how much it comes out to." 

"I... you really trust me with a blank check?" He shrugged. 

"Its only money, Harleen, and I trust you to do the right thing." She gave him a brilliant smile. She was doing the right thing. She was making her patient safe. In the end Harleen was able to get everything she wanted and the amount of supplies made it easy to hide the guns. It had cost her 1,000 dollars and 1 cent. The week flying by with stolen kisses with the Joker. He still seemed a little hesitant, but she chalked that up to nerves and the fact that he was still learning to forgive her and reconciling Harleen and Not Harleen as the same person.   
\------------------------  
The gun fire had started 10 minutes ago and she flinched every time another burst of it started. After about 15 minutes the door to the women's bathroom opened and she heard Frost calling for her. 

"Harleen? Harleen you in here?" She opened the door to the stall and stepped out giving Frost a big smile. "Come on, I'm going to need to grip your arm and make it look like your being abducted." She nodded and allowed him to get a tight grip of her arm. It was a little uncomfortable and as they stepped out the door she breathed in shock. The place was a mess of papers and she could see guys in masks and fake swat gear gunning people down. There were the bodies of several staff members and patients littering the floor clearly dead. She was surprised when Frost pulled her the opposite direction of the doors. She pulled her arm and looked questioningly at the door and he discretely shook his head with a sad look. That's when she understood. She had been played, the Joker still wanted revenge and he was going to get it.

She started struggling in earnest and another of the men came over to help pull her down the stairs to the electric shock room. At one point she fell to the ground and tried to crawl away from them her hand clawing desperately at the ground to keep away. But they just picked her back up and dragged her into the room. 

One of the patients was in the room shivering from a dose of the treatment and the Joker could be seen in the observation room beating a man to death with a crow bar. She assumed it was probably doctor. Bartholomew and shivered to realize that she was next. She fought like hell as Frost helped tie her down. Refusing to meet her eyes as he get's her strapped in. 

"Don't do this, please don't do this." The Joker walks into the room. Somehow Frost has gotten him his hair dye and grease paint and for the first time she get's to see the full effect in person of the Joker. 

He looks deeply into her eyes seeing the steel blue. 

"Don't do this, I helped you, we helped you, we love you."

"No, you tortured me. You stole the woman I was falling for and forced her to cooperate because you couldn't stand being second best to her. You, Harleen, left me in a black hole of rage and confusion. Do you know I haven't been able to remember what his face looks like since those treatments you so lovingly ordered for me? My one happiness and I can barely remember." He slammed his hands down repeatedly. 

"You going to kill me Mr. J?"

"I'm not going to kill you, not with Not-Harleen still in there somewhere. But I'm going to hurt you really really bad." She was so focused on his eyes that she hadn't seen Frost getting the machine ready or handing him the handles. 

"You think so Mr. J? Well I can take it. She and I are the same person again. You torture me you are torturing her too." He sneered looking confused for a second before asking Frost for his belt. 

"Here, open wide, no reason to destroy your teeth or bite your tongue." She wouldn't cry, she looked up at him as the electricity hit her brain.


	12. Harlequin Rising

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> End of Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a rather unique perspective on Harleen's behavior. When I was very young my mother received electroshock therapy and suffered rather extensive brain damage as a result. In suicide squad a lot of Harly's behaviors seem like they come out after the acid but a lot of it I personally believe is from the Joker frying her brain.

Harleen wasn't sure when she closed her eyes. A kaleidoscope of colors was wrapping around her memories. There were little jumps in the moments some of her happiest moments no longer complete. She heard yelling above her head but it took her awhile before the sounds had no meanings. 

"J... J you need to stop. That's enough, you're going to kill her."

"They held me under much longer."

"You were medicated, you will kill them both if you don't stop."

Joker pulled the electro paddles away from her head. 

"Come on, open your eyes." There were little taps to her checks "Let me see the ice in those eyes." Her steel blue eyes opened and he let out an anguished yell. Pounding down next to her head again. He had failed. She was still Harleen. 

"We're leaving." Frost went to unbelt Harleen, "Not her, just us. Leave her for the cops to find." Joker wouldn't look at her again. He walked out of the room gun in hand to shoot anyone that got in his way from leaving. 

Frost gave her a sad look. "Don't linger, you don't look too guilty yet. Once they give you an opening take it and leave town while you can." He turned and hurried after Joker. 

\-----------------------

Harleen woke up in the hospital. She wasn't handcuffed to the bed so she was assuming that Frost was right. She wasn't presumed guilty yet. There was a police officer stationed at her door and when he saw she was awake he called for the doctor. 

"Hello Dr. Quinzel. How are you feeling?"

"Foggy, like some things, some memories aren't right. They jump in spots. And the colors are wrong like there's this pink/blue frame around them."

He sighed, "I'm sorry Dr. Quinzel. You suffered some pretty serious brain damage due to exposure to electroshock. Your self control will have been compromised, you will probably find that you have trouble with memory both past memory but also retaining new memories. I'll have to report this to the medical board and your medical license will be revoked. As will your driver's license though that you should be able to regain eventually." She started crying and the doctor looked uncomfortable. "I'm sure you will be allowed to keep the title of Dr and only your license to practice will be revoked. That plus I'm sure there is a large insurance check with your name on it due to the extent of harm done to you. It won't all be bad." She just started crying harder. She had lost the man she loved, she lost her dream job, she couldn't drive, and once they figured out she had helped the joker plan his escape she would loose her title of doctor and become a fugitive of the law. 

The doctor gave her an awkward pat on her shoulder thinking it was the impulse control causing the issue. From what he could tell from her behavior so far mentally she was operating at the level of a 15/16 year old. "The police will need to speak to you about what happened." She nodded and braced herself. Hopefully she was able to convince them enough to get out of here. She spoke to the police for over an hour. Stating she had been in the bathroom when the shoots had started. That the security officer Frost had come in she had thought he was there to help her get to one of the safe rooms but instead had taken her to the Joker to be tortured. "I thought he was my friend. But he was just the Joker's friend." It didn't take much to start crying again and the police finally gave her a break. Asking for her number so they could follow up with any questions. 

Harleen almost immediately asked to leave, even offering to sign a form agreeing that she was leaving against medical advise. She was advised that she was under an involuntary hold. That until they did more tests to confirm the complete amount of damage that she was not considered competent and without a next of kin no one could sign her out either. She was stuck. 

\---------------------

Frost took Joker back to the apartment so they could grab anything that was needed. The apartment would no longer be able to be used as a safe house now that he was a known associate of the Joker. Frost grabbed the photo albums with his wife and Joker grabbing his batman onsie. They also had a little bit of paperwork here regarding plans and bank accounts that was packed up. Due to Frost's pre planning it only took about 10 minutes to grab everything and they were out the door to the one of the Joker's safe houses. It was a little one bedroom place like Frost's had been. A little dusty from lack of use but it would do while they were lying low. The lights from the club next door coming in through the windows but thankfully they could not hear the beat. Frost made them a quick dinner having thought to have the fridge stocked the day before. 

"Do you want me to take the couch?" 

Joker grunted, "We've shared the bed before, what difference does it make now?" 

Frost just nodded and didn't say what he was thinking. 'Because now we are both mourning.'

They took turns in the bathroom and climbed into bed. The Joker in a rare moment of needing comfort wrapped around Frost. His forehead on Frost's back. "I thought I could get her back. Thought I could electro-fry Harleen right out of her."

Frost rotated around so he could look at the Joker, "J, I know you don't want to hear this but have you considered that its healthier for not-harleen to be her complete self? If you truly love her, you need to forgive Harleen and let her be healthy. I truly think she is sorry and you more then got revenge."

"I know but I just can't trust her, not after what she did, not after what I did. It would take something astronomical to trust her. For her to prove herself." Frost sighed, this was going every bit as badly as he assumed it would. He turned back around and felt J's arms settle back in. The fake cowl of the onsie rubbing against the back of his head. 

The next morning they settled in to watch the news around the escape. So far the police were only able to confirm Frost's involvement in the break out but were still following other leads. The covered the dead and finally they got to the Harleen of it all. The doctor was going to loose her medical license due to a traumatic brain injury during the attack. Frost turned to glare at the Joker when he shoot the TV. 

"And how are we supposed to keep up with whats going on without the news?" The Joker grunted and walked into the kitchen with his cereal bowl. Frost followed him still glaring and Joker turned around to glare back finally giving up and sighing. 

"I'll go steal us another one tonight."

\------------

Harleen quietly crept down the hall. When she had originally been told she wasn't allowed to leave she had thrown a fit which was not really helping her chances of escaping. The impulse control issues already poising a problem. So far the hardest part had been getting to her clothes, but now that she was no longer in the hospital gown she was usually overlooked and she managed to get out of the hospital without further issues. 

The first place she went was Frost's but quickly turned and went the other way. It was crawling with police officers and she couldn't remember if she had told them the address or maybe they had gotten it from his work profile? She went by the old run down amusement park and the fair grounds but there was nothing there. Apparently those were too obvious and there were no signs that it had ever been used by the joker or his men. Gothom wasn't a small city and they honestly could be anywhere. Running from the hospital would cause an alert for her to be sent out. She quickly withdrew as much money from her bank account as possible and went to find somewhere cheap to stay. She entered the cheap little motel room and turned on the tv. Sitting and waiting for signs of the Joker to start hitting the news. It didn't take long though she wandered why his first act after escaping from Arkham was to steal a tv. 'maybe he wants me to know where he is!' She jumped up and speed out of the room. Her heart in her chest she stole a motorcycle that some delivery driver had left the keys in and took off to the last known location of the pursuit. She was about a block away from where she could see the police sirens when a car she had only seen once pulled out of an alley going the opposite way. That car belong to Chuck. Or as she later found out his name was Chuckles. She made a U-turn and started following the car quickly pulling up beside it. She saw the Joker roll his eyes at seeing her and sneer. Keeping his eyes fixed firmly on the road, she decided to speed up and cut him off. Going as far as tipping and jumping on top of the bike instead of giving it enough time to properly slow down. 

She watched as his eyes went wide and he hit the brakes on the car. She ran over to it slamming on the hood and he got out of the car. 

"What the hell do you want Harleen." 

"You are not leaving me" He rolled his eyes "You are not leaving me, what do I have to do to prove that I love you?"

"Bring her back, that's how you can prove you love me."

"I am her! And to a lesser extent I am Harleen. But I am here. And I love you so much. I let you torture me just to show you how much I love you. To make you feel like you got your revenge for the horrible wrong done to you. Please let me in! Please! I promise we will never hurt you again." A truck pulled in behind them and started hunking its horn. 

"I don't have time for this Harleen, even getting involved with you was a mistake. I don't have time for love, I'm not someone that is loved. I'm an idea of chaos. I make a plan and execute it for the good of Gothom to get them out of this bubble of complacency. I don't have time to have your tender kindness running around. Go home or better get out of town while you still can." The driver of the truck had finally had enough and got out of the car to yell at them. 

"Hey asshole, mind screaming at your bitch somewhere else?" Harleen grabbed one of Joker's guns and shot the man. Joker gave her a moment's consideration. That act had been all non-Harleen. Then she pointed the gun in his face, he could tell she wouldn't do it and gave her a blank look. 

"My heart scares you and a gun doesn't." He sighed. 

"Get in the car Harleen, I want to show you something." She quickly got in the car and they were off. Leaving the dead driver behind they made their way over to ACE chemicals. The Joker leading her up to a balcony above the chemical fumes. 

"When I was first getting my start as an activist I broke into ACE chemicals to prove the toxic sludge they were pumping into Gothom's water. Little did I know that Batman was about to have one of the first epic battles of his career and in the chaos I went into that toxic slime. Thankfully I was able to pull myself out unharmed. From then on my obsession became the batman. Proving that he was fallible that much like the cops." She looked at him in awe, she doubted that even Frost had been told this story. "How do I trust you Harleen?" She started to talk but he cut her off. "Would you die for me?" 

"Yes"

"Hmm that's not quite right. Would you live for me?"

"Yes" 

"Good" He pushed her and she fell back over the side of the balcony and into the waste below. He started to walk away and with every beat his heart would stutter and break. Growling his pulled his jacket off and threw down his gun holster. 

He jumped in after her pulling her out of the sludge. His mouth going to hers he put air back into her lungs. She opened her eyes and he laughed kissing her deeply. Her eyes had been like ice. The Harlequin had risen. 


	13. Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harley and Joker bond and discuss the incident at ACE.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is beginning of part two and will cover Harly and Joker's life together and the suicide squad movie. Also we will start getting into smut. 
> 
> Updated note: Way more smut in this chapter then originally intended 0.o but hope you enjoy ;p

Her thoughts were twisting and turning. He had pushed her. He didn't love her, he only loved Not-Harleen. The message clear he would sacrifice both of them if he couldn't have her. For the second time her personalities split. This time Harleen hiding deep deep down. It was time for the shield to be put aside and the warrior to be unleashed.  
\-----------  
Joker helped pull them both from the toxic vat. Their clothes disintegrating, he pulled them into the emergency showers prioritizing cleaning her off. He almost had her cleaned when she fell to the floor starting to convulse and throw up. She had clearly swallowed some of the mixture and his eyes went wide in panic. Both times he had gone in he had never managed to swallow any of it. He pulled her hair back and sat with her hoping she was able to get it all out of her system. He frowned as he noticed her skin starting to go unnaturally white and her hair started to lose its color as well going white like she had left bleach in her hair for far too long. She stopped convulsing and looked at him with tired eyes. He rubbed the pad of his thumb along her check bone. 

"how are you feeling? Do you think you got it all out?" She nodded her head too tired to talk. 

"I need to wash off and then I'll take us home." She closed her eyes feeling him adjust the shower head. The feel of the water and the tile lulling her to sleep as her body got over the after shocks of the burning pain that had been ripping through her. She vaguely remembered her body being picked up and placed in the car. A gentle kiss on her forehead and then blackness.  
\---------------  
Joker carried Not-Harleen into the hide out saying nothing to Frost's wide eye stare as his boss walked in completely naked with an equally naked Harleen. He walked passed him into the bedroom putting her in the bed. He tried putting the batman onsie on her but she cried out and he left it be. He couldn't keep himself from wincing when pulling it on instead. He forgot how irritated that crap could make your skin. He walked back out to talk to Frost. 

"TV is in the car. I, ah, ran into Harleen."

"What the fuck happened J? And why does she look like that? And why is she here?"

"I may have pushed her into a vat of toxic waste and then jumped in to save her. She's not-Harleen again though I'm not sure how long that will last. She accidentally swallowed some of the toxins which is why she looks like that." 

"And if Harleen does come back out?" 

"I've proven I can't let her die. That's the second time I tried to basically kill her and pulled off at the last second. For better or worse, I've chosen my Queen. I'll deal with Harleen if it means that I can have Harley."

"Harley?"

"It was time she got a name other then not-Harleen. Harley Quinn like the clown figure." 

"She'll love that. Guess I'm sleeping on the couch?"

"Unfortunately, her skin's too irritated for clothes and only I get to see my Queen naked." Frost opened his mouth to retort, "Don't ah, push it, I'm trying to forget about the fact that you did see her naked." 

"I'm glad the two of you are happy." Joker smirked and walked back into the room. Thinking on it he stripped back out of the onsie. He didn't want it accidentally brushing up against Harley and hurting her. He slipped into the covers and pulled her over to him. Kissing her check he nuzzled her hair, placing one hand on her sternum with his thumb gently stroking the bottom curve of her breast and curling the other hand over her pillow. He feel asleep still gently stroking her skin.  
\---------------  
He woke with a moan and a sucking sensation in the perfect place. He tossed off the covers and pulled her hair aside so he could watch as she moved her head up and down along his dick. His eyes dilating as she pulls off to look him in the eyes as her tongue swipes across the purple mushroom head. Dipping down slightly into the slit before slowly inching her mouth back down breaking eye contact to more easily swallow him down. She stopped when she was two thirds of the way down his cock and traced the vine on the underside of his dick on the way back. Her hand replacing her mouth. 

"That's as far down as I can go by myself. Will you help me go the rest of the way?" His eyes rolled to the back of his head and he used every bit of his will power not to cum right then. She was asking him to help her chock on his dick. He nodded and grabbed onto her hair. He let her set her own pace on the way back down. Growling at her when she stopped at places to tease him with her tongue. She finally got back to the place she had stopped last and looked up at him pleadingly. He helped tilt her head and thrusted up at the same time he used her hair to push her head further down. He held her in place groaning as her felt her throat spasm against him. He started thrusting small little movements every once in while pulling back enough that she could get air before plunging back in to bury deep in her throat again. As he felt himself getting closer he pulled her hair back so she would look him in the eyes. 

"Blink twice if I can cum down your throat." Two very flirtations and deliberate blinks. His fingers tangled even more in hair holding her head still as he moved his hips. He felt her throat spasm around him again pushing himself down as far as he could and heard her chock as he came with her nose pushed hard against his pelvic bone. He gave a few softer thrusts as he finished feeling her swallow down his seed, and helped her gently start pulling off of him. Slight tears coming from her eyes but a giant smile on her face. He gave her a tender kiss.  
"Baby, that was perfect. Thank you." He moved his lips up to her forehead and placed a kiss there as well moving his thumbs under her eyes to catch the tears. "I'm going to go get you something to drink. Do you need any aspirin?" She nodded with a sheepish smile and he gave her a tender grin. 

He flipped off Frost when he saw the man's knowing grin. Walking into the kitchen to get Harley a glass of water and some aspirin. He was pretty sure that was the best blow job he had ever had. Sure he had women in the past deep throat him but none had ever surrendered the control for him to push his cock into their throats or even more asked him to help them if they couldn't manage to. He brought Harley the glass and pills and watched as she swallowed them down. He pulled them back under the covers and they kissed until the both fell back asleep. 

This time he was the first to wake. Recalling the pleasure she had brought him earlier his cock quickly began to get hard again. He dove under the covers and brought her leg to his mouth. He started with small little kisses against her ankle and felt her twitch. His kisses slowly moving upwards and increasing in intensity. By the time he got to her knee he could feel her start to wiggle as her body slowly woke up. Placing a little nip to her inner knee he heard her breath hitch and the felt a hand move down to caress his hair. The blanket being moved aside a little. He progressed to hot open mouthed sucking and biting kisses as he moved up her thigh. The Joker put his weight on his elbows and knees grabbing a thin pillow to put under her hips to help prop her up, and she curled her legs up out of the way. He spread her lips giving him an unobstructed view and gave a little Eskimo kiss to her clit hearing her give a breathy laugh, he laughed with her and the hot air he accidentally puffed against her turned the laugh into a moan and he felt a tug on his curls. He gently touched the tip of his tongue to the area around her clit making teasing circles never touching the place where she wanted him. He brought the circles in smaller and smaller and felt the hand in his hair tighten causing him to moan and thrust against the bed. He finally brought the tip of his tongue to the bundle of nerves. He heard her give a little purr of pleasure and felt his hips give another thrust. He sucked her clit into his mouth alternating between sucking and giving it small licks. The fingers of his right hand moving down stopping just before entering her letting her feel his fingers there. 

"Yes, please yes." He pushed a finger in and felt her walls tighten around it. Caressing her inner walls he increased his suction on her clit and felt her bring her legs up even higher splaying them wide. He felt a gush of liquid and used it to his advantage to add a second finger curling the fingers up and finding that spongy bit of tissue inside of her that had her seeing stars. He felt her come apart her legs jerking as she struggled to keep them in place. Once he felt the climax recede he pulled his fingers out popping them into his mouth and moaning. She really was extremely sweet and he wished he had taken the opportunity to stick his tongue inside her as well. He saw her giving him a tired and sedated look and he gave her a wicked grin back. There was no time like the present. He dove back down hooking her legs over his shoulders this time and started to lick all of her juices from her lips before plunging his tongue where his fingers had been only moments before. He heard her moaning pick up again feeling disappointed when she unhooked her legs from his shoulders and tugged his hair back showing she wanted him to stop. She pulled him up her body and kissed him deeply pushing her tongue into his mouth and caressing around his own so she could taste herself. 

Pulling her face away she whispered "Take me, not with your fingers or tongue just take me." He growled and hoisted her legs back up with the command to hold them there. He dipped his finger back down checking she was still wet enough for him. Smirking when he felt that she was he lined himself up and started to push in. She was incredibly tight and he shook trying to hold himself back from pushing in too far too fast. He slowly started to move back and forth letting her get used to a few inches before moving in deeper. He snaked his hand between them to rub her clit distracting from the pain of being slowly stretched by his wide girth and length. By the time he bottomed out he was sweating and he was sure he was accidentally leaving bruises on the hip he was holding. He left himself seated in her while gently rolling his hips. Letting her get used to the stretch before he started truly moving in her. She started to rock her hips back and he gave a sigh. 

"its okay. You can start moving. I can take it." He groaned but did as she asked. Still going slow for the time being only pulling out a couple of inches before moving back in. "I'm not going to break. I want this. He looked into her icy blue eyes and speed up. His queen could have anything she wanted. He also increased the speed on her clitoris, between the feast he had on her pussy and the torturous process of slowly stretching her on his cock he wasn't going to last much longer know that he was giving fast and harder thrusts. He felt her walls clamp down and he cried out in pleasure losing his control over the pace moving both his hands to her hips after he was sure it wouldn't cut off her orgasm and used the leverage to slam himself even harder into her. Stilling inside of her as his cock burst. He pulled out and gave teasing kisses over her face causing her to break out in giggles. 

"Who's showering first?" 

She raised her eyebrow at him "You mean we aren't going to shower together?"

"Do you think we can keep our hands off each other if we do? Poor Frost probably left the apartment and you my dear have to be getting sore." He gently rubbed her and she gave a little whimper. Smacking his hands away. 

"I'll go first but don't complain if I take all the hot water." He gave her butt a smack and she yelped. Making a show of her walk to the door. "I think I'll take a nice long bath." He growled and jumped out of the bed following her out the door. Thankfully he was right and Frost had long since docked out of the apartment. 

They didn't have sex again in the bath though it was close. They shared sweet kisses and hands trailed learning each other's bodies better. When they were done Joker let the water out and wrapped a towel around himself ducking out to make sure Frost had not returned. He had obviously been there but had left again leaving a note that he was going to speed some time at the henchmen's safe house instead. The note also included that he had purchased some clothes for Ms. Quin. Joker found the softess nightgown and brought it in to her. He could see the towel had re-irritated her skin and hoped the gown would be soft enough. He had pulled on a pair of batman sleep pants instead of the onsie. It was getting warm enough that he may have to put that away for the summer and frowned. Once they were dressed they went to the kitchen to warm up the food Frost had sweetly left for them. The settled in and started eating both aware that they needed to have a very serious conversation. 

Joker gave a grunt and started "I'm sorry, to you and Harleen both. I, ah, shouldn't have pushed you. It was a mistake. I felt like I had lost you forever. I'm not going to lie. It is you I want, you are my other half, my queen, my beautiful Harlequin. I'll put up with Harleen when I have to but its Harley that I want."

"Harley?" He shrugged a little sheepish. 

"I got sick of calling you Not-Harleen. I hope you like it. Its a play on the name Harleen Quinzel its my way of acknowledging that she is always going to be there even if you are two different people. So instead of Harleen Quinzel would you like to be Harley Quinn?"

She jumped up and hopped into his lap. "I love it. The Joker and his Harlequin. I'm pretty sure I'm like this permanently. You pushing us into that vat really did a number on Harleen. It..." Her breath hitched "it effected both of us pretty bad. You were willing to kill both of us just because you couldn't have me. That's a pretty big deal." 

"I know, I can't say I'm sorry enough. Jesus, I'm even willing to apologize to Harleen. I just snapped, I swear it will never happen again. I will not ever lay a finger on you again no matter what personality is occupying you. You are my lover, my queen, my soulmate." He gently picked her off his lap and left the room coming back with a weapon. "I'm going to teach you how to use this. If I ever lay a hand on you again I want you to shoot me." She tried to protest and he gave her a gentle kiss. "No exceptions. I'll let you decide if its fatal or not. I have never believed in hitting your partner. Loyalty is important to me and how on earth can you expect your partner to be loyal when you terrorize them. I broke that promise with you and with Harleen even if I didn't consider her and I together." She nodded and set the weapon down. Snuggling into his arms. 

"I can't reach Harleen to tell her what you said. She's too scared to come out. I can feel her fear but that's as far as I can communicate with her." He gave a nod and kissed her forehead wrapping his arms more firmly around her. Harleen had more then paid her debt to him. He didn't think he could truly get over what she had done but he would never terrorize her again. He was finally getting that she was a part of his soulmate and he shuddered to think what his abuse of her had done to the one he loved. 

They sat there for a little time before Harley's stomach rumbled. "Desert time!!!!!!!!!" She jumped up and ran to the fridge coming back with two pudding cups and spoons. He looked at her rather sheepish. 

"I guess now would be a good time to tell you I actually don't like pudding." Her jaw dropped and he laughed. He knew how much trouble she had gone to, making sure to always steal pudding cups for their therapy sessions together. Even getting an official reprimand on Harleen's almost pristine work record when she was caught once. 

"I guess I'll have to eat this all myself, huh puddin'?" He groaned. 

"Do not make that a pet name!" Her answering smirk said it all.


	14. Complications

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Inside look at Joker's operation and Joker gets a front row seat to the consequences of his actions. Harley and Joker continue to bond.

Joker looked down at Harley as she slept. He was a little concerned with how much she was sleeping but wasn't sure if it was a result of the numerous rounds of sex, the after math of the toxins she had swallowed or maybe a combination of the two. They had wound up fucking on the kitchen table after Harley had found some rather creative ways to make him enjoy pudding more. He was pretty sure he would be willing to eat anything off her breasts. He felt his cock give a twitch of interest at the thought of his teeth scraping against her nipple but it didn't get any harder. He was a little worn out himself, maybe if he had meet Harley when he was a slightly younger man. Not that 39 was old, but it was old enough that three rounds within a 6 hour period with the last 2 being within an hour of each other was a bit much. 

He brushed his lips on her forehead and pulled the blanket more securely around her. He needed to find something to leave her a note and go get Frost. Batman was on the lamb due to the death of Harvey Dent as well as the other officers he had supposedly killed. Not that Joker believed it for a second. They still had a decent amount from the bank heist but would need to do something soon. Joker also needed updates on his more legal business ventures. One of which was the club next door the amusement mile. It was used to launder money but other then that ran as a normal business. A good portion of profit going to charities for those with mental disabilities. He snorted he was actually the biggest contributor to Arkham right after Bruce Wayne. The club was off limits for dirty dealings as it was club for teens and young adults under 21. No alcohol, no mob connections, and batman help anyone found selling drugs in there. 

His other club Laffy Taffy was were he did most of his meetings. Deals for arms and explosives, recruitment for muscle, hit requests, all arranged from his private office in the club. He also had a penthouse there but rarely used it though that may need to change with the inclusion of Harley. Most of the safe houses were one bedroom apartments and he usually needed and wanted Frost around to help with planning any spur of the moment ideas that came to him. He laid the note on the table and rushed to the car, his hair hidden mostly under a baseball cap. 

\------  
Walking back into the safe house with Frost was surreal. At first glance it seemed like nothing in the apartment was undamaged and Harley lay in the middle of the floor naked and sobbing. Frost quickly turned his gaze away from Harley pulling out his gun to search the safe house. Joker pulled out his gun gaze trailing around the room and kitchen before refocusing on Harley. He knelt next to her scared when she gave no reaction to seeing him. He brushed his fingers threw her hair and tilted her head up to look at him. It was still Harley but what on Earth had happened? 

"Harley?" She started to stir. 

"Puddin'? Puddin!" She jumped pushing her arms around his neck. He saw Frost walk back into the room and shake his head. There was no one else there and it was unlikely anyone would have left Harley alive. 

"Baby..." He tilted her head to look at him "What happened? Are you hurt? Did someone break in?"

"I..." She started to tremble " I don't think so. I think I remember waking up and then I couldn't find you and then I figured there must be a note but I couldn't find one in the bedroom. I think I remember starting to knock things over trying to find one maybe I was starting to panic..." She looked so lost and confused. "I don't know how much I'm remembering and how much I'm making up based on clues on what the apartment looks like. They said at the hospital I was going to have problems due to the shock therapy. Said I would have impulse control issues and memory loss as well as trouble making new memories. Puddin' I'm scared. Look at this place if I did this because I couldn't find a fucking note." Joker held her closer. 

"It's going to be okay Harls. Frosty and me will take care of you. Besides your dating a terrorist this level of destruction could come in handy. Maybe not in the safe houses but I wouldn't mind winding you up and watching you go during a battle with batman." Joker looked up at Frost to confirm he was in this with him and got another nod before Frost ducked back into the bedroom and tossed a soft dress to Joker. Averting his gaze as the Joker slipped it over her head. 

"Get the guys over here to clean this place up. Anything salvageable needs to be brought over to the Laffy Taffy penthouse. Frost if you could please personally see to any of the more sensitive documents?" 

"You got it boss." 

Joker picked Harley up straightening out her dress carrying her out to the car. Thankfully it was the middle of the day so the club would be closed any workers on site would know better then to say anything about the boss's presence in the building. He had been planning on carrying her into the building as well but she resisted. If she was going to be on his arm her first semi public appearance with him couldn't be with him carrying her. He gave her an approving nod and they walked into the building his hand firmly curled around her hips and lower back. The glare to all the men making it clear, she was his. 

They spent a week in the penthouse making the space more suited to the three of them. Frost was eternally grateful that the penhouse was multiple floors and was able to pick a room far from the other two. He wouldn't be able to hear them but he was just a quick walk away if the boss needed him. The henchmen were spending their spare time down in the club to be on hand for planning or errands for the boss and Ms. Quinn. Something Harley took full advantage of, Joker and Frost had been out casing a place only to come back and find Ms. Quinn with her hair dyed two different colors. 

"I couldn't decide, Puddin', which one do you like best?" Joker shooed Frost who rolled his eyes. At least Ms. Quinn had the excuse that her impulse control made her act like a 16 year old but Joker was acting every bit like a teenager too. As sappy as it was, love suited him. He seemed calmer and hadn't made any plans to antagonize the batman. Though some of that may have been from concern over Ms. Quinn. Most of the time she was fine but every once in awhile she went off the deep end. Especially when they were teaching her how to use weapons. She was fucking terrifying with a bat. He heard Joker say " I love it just like this. You look like a cotton candy display. I'm going to have to eat you up." Frost heard her squeal just as he was shutting the door behind himself and rushed down the hall. 

\----------------------  
It took them a month to get the next job set up. The desperate of Gothom always jumping at a chance to do a job with a big payoff. Well big payoff if they lived. Their numbers were low, several guys getting picked up either by the batman or killed in the terrorist attacks months ago and Joker was using this as a recruitment opportunity for more permanent positions in his organization. This also had the added benefit of being a bigger payday for Joker and Frost if the men didn't pass. It was simple each man was instructed to kill one member of the operation. Any one that didn't kill their target was in, showing loyalty to the men they were working with over an anonymous contractor. As long as they also managed to avoid getting killed by whoever was their assigned killer. Trouble struck, however, when Ms. Quinn insisted on joining them. 

"Please Puddin', I want to rob a bank! That would be soo much fun. We can show case your harlequin to the world."

"Not until you are more proficient with weapons. All these men have orders to kill. I don't want you accidentally hurt by some idiot thinking he is going to take it a step further and bump off extra shares." She was still pouting when they left. 

The job went off without a hitch. They even managed to keep two of the guys. Joker started to sit down joining them for a drink for once but then stopped and straightened back up. Chuckles was walking over with his 'I fucked up and I'm going to die for it' face on. 

"What happened?" Joker growled. 

"Ms. Quinn lied and told the wait staff she had permission to leave. I got caught up in the football game and missed it. That was almost three hours ago and she still isn't back." Joker licked his scars.

"Hut ut ut ut tah, why so serious, Chuckles." He gave a laugh that had no humor in it. "You say that like you think I'm going to kill you for my Queen being out alone in Gotom without any fucking protection." Joker picked up the bat the bar used for protection and swung breaking Chuckles arm. "Find her, or I swear I will kill you." Chuckles went to run out of the room only to stop. Ms. Quinn was in the door way with a bright smile on her face. 

"Puddin'! You're back! I was sooo lonely and bored. No one here would play with me. I got a surprise for you!" Joker's face was like stone and he gestured for Harley to come join him heading back up to the penthouse. 

"Frost get them settled and have someone see to Chuckles arm." The elevator door closing behind them.   
\---------------  
Frost wasn't sure what he had been expecting when he got back up to the penthouse but it sure wasn't what he saw. Joker was no where to be seen and Ms. Quinn was crying in the kitchen. The place was a wreck and it was anyone's guess which of the two if not both of them were responsible. 

"What happened Ms. Quinn?" It didn't feel right to call her Harley almost disrespectful after his role in destroying her mind. 

" I got a tattoo. I thought he would like it. He loved my hair so much. But it made him super mad even madder then the fact that I ran off by myself." 

"Whats the tattoo of?" 

"It just says "Daddy's little monster. I thought it was cute since Mr. J technically created me. It sounded vaguely familiar so I thought that maybe at some point he had called me that." She sniffled, "But apparently that's what he called Harleen when they had their big fight and she sent him to shock treatment. He told me to go away and not come in the bedroom. Even called me Harleen by accident." Frost groaned he couldn't believe them fighting was actually worse then all the sex. He sent a message down to the guys to discretely get the place cleaned up. Bringing Ms. Quinn to his room which thankfully they had respected and stayed out of during their fight. He found her a shirt to wear and sent her into his ensuite to change. Getting into his pjs as well. It was funny how easy they got into their previous sleeping arrangement. Still with that layer between them now there to protect her modesty and him from J's wrath. They drifted off to sleep only waking when the Joker joined them in bed squishing Frost to the middle. 

"Ugh stop pushing." Harley complained. 

"Still mad at you, and Frosty was my cuddle buddy first." Frost rolled his eyes especially when their hands met on his stomach clasping together. They back asleep quickly with no further incidents. When Frost woke he could feel them making out above his head. 

"If you're doing that you need to go back to your own bedroom. Especially since J's morning "Helper" is pressing onto my ass." Ms. Quinn snorted quickly followed by Joker as they left the room. Frost rolled onto his stomach and went back to sleep wondering how he had managed to become a parent of two overly horny teenagers almost over night.


End file.
